bear stick

an important tool finely crafted from hardwood as a last line of defense againt grizzley bear attacks. to create a bear stick go camping with a bestfriend and talk about bears until both of you are scared shitless for no good reason. then find a stick about the thickness of chuck norris' dick or 4" in diameter. continue to tell scary stories around a fire designed to keep bears and mountain lions away while taking turns to sharpen the end of the skinny side of the stick. a full beard and a lot of vodka is a crucial part of creating the perfect bear stick. if and when the bear stick is complete and you are attacked and have wasted all large knives and rocks by throwing them in a frenzy allow the bear to charge at you and at the last second when it lunges to eat your face securely slam the blunt end of the bear stick into the ground and aim the sharp end at the bears chest. the bear will fall on the stick and die and then the bear stick can then be used to cook the bear rotisserie style over the fire created earlier.

mike: hey man did you hear that noise?
dan: yeah man sharpen the bear stick faster.

by baerhunter May 6, 2011

bear poking

When a fat hairy bodied bald man (the bear) aggrivates a muscular homosexual man resulting in an anal rape response

during and after a fantasy football league the bear taunts the homosexual man for the poor performance of his team while at a party and when he excuses himself to the men's he is followed and bear poking ensues

by LMAO observer December 31, 2011

The cuban bear

A man known as the Cuban bear is a mythical legend. Loves nothing more than a bottle of buckfast and going on a buzz.

Oh fuck the Cuban bear just downed a bottle of vodka and fell in the shower

by The Cuban bear February 22, 2020

jack bear

Wins it all then losses it all, find himself in trouble with a jock. Mainly lives at macdonalds but never gets fat. And the only person to turn down first cricket.

Bear the athlete, the gambler . The obscurer unit.

If you find yourself a Jack Bear give him your money , hell always double it.

by randomhehehehee March 23, 2017

naked bear

A fat hairy gay man with a large dick.

Man your stepdad is a naked bear-allison

Ya my mom tells me that all the time-alison

by Nakedbearotter April 18, 2017

skin a bear

To take a shit. Alternative slang to such common phrases as "go see a man about a horse." Usually a phrase that is thrown around in a more redneck crowd. Often refers to the specific act of taking a 'praire shit.'

Pull over, Clem, I gotta go skin a bear!

by Deerslayer59301 May 27, 2007

Angry Bear

Known fact that this is the fastest land animal in the world.

Listen every one knows the fastest land animal is the cheetah. Hmmmmm going to have to disagree angry bears Are the fastest.

by Pike1905 April 5, 2019