GARY, THERE’S A BOMB STRAPPED TO MY CHEST! IT’S GONNA EXPLODE IN THREE SECONDS UNLESS YOU GET A BATH!

When you want your pet named Gary to get a bath, so you strap a bomb to your chest in an attempt to scare him in to doing it.

Robert:“GARY, THERE’S A BOMB STRAPPED TO MY CHEST! IT’S GONNA EXPLODE IN THREE SECONDS UNLESS YOU GET A BATH!”

Gary:”Meow”

(Robert explodes)

by Intruderalertredspyisinthebase August 20, 2024

a human second

A human second, exactly one second.

That image was funny, for about a human second.

by Trico Everfire May 18, 2018

Farrell's Second

The equivalent of two seconds.

Kevin seems to be counting down by a Farrell's Second like the cheater he is.

by SamTheGriff August 2, 2019

second date hussy

A woman who goes on two dates with two different guys in one evening. The first date is with a guy who usually provides a free dinner; and the second date is a sleep-over with her lover.

Sleeping with my second date hussy is such a turn on. My second date hussy is such a cheap date. I hope my second date hussy isn't cheating on me. Hey second date hussy, what's in the doggy bag? Thank you for texting me the menu before you ordered, you second date hussy.

by Diamond Jack October 22, 2012

second-cousin

1- Grandpibling's grandchild.
2- Someone who, in relation to others, has zero parents, zero grandparents and two great-grandparents in common.

Second-cousin.

by Cerejini May 21, 2024

The Marajuana Ten Second Brain Delay

The delay that comes from being way too high. The reason you laugh after everyone else has gotten a joke, fail to grab a railing in time, raise your hands after you've been punched and redirect your aim only after you've peed on the floor.

(end of joke)...to get to the other side!

(crowd laughs)
(you look blankly at the teller)
wait
wait
wait
wait
wait
wait
wait
wait
wait
wait
(you laugh, everyone else has stopped)
"Noooooo waaaaaay....the OTHER SIDE....HAHAHAHAHAH!"
Hence, The Marajuana Ten Second Brain Delay

by The Real IX April 20, 2010

second great-cousin-uncle

Grandparent's male second cousin.

My second great-cousin-uncle is a good person.

by Hgcloziw November 23, 2019