Load the sofa

Making sure you have a semi before you hit the surf.
"Going to load the sofas then head in on main beach I think"
by JimmyJames2000 November 15, 2021
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Sofa Bear

OhhhhhhhHhhHHHhHHHhhHHHh theres a bear on the sofa......
there is a bear on the sofa (Sofa Bear)
by Anonymous girl 123 October 28, 2021
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sofa gob

Sofa Gobs are those who comment on and/or criticise reality tv participants - (xfactor, britains got talent, im a celeb) and think they can do better themselves. Sofa gobs are closely related to back seat drivers and couch potatoes.
"Sofa gobs" can be found the length and breadth of the UK on Saturday and Sunday evenings commenting on popular television programmes.

"I could do better meself sat on this bloody sofa than that crock of shite and i`ve got a bloody sore throat!"

"Look at the state of her - Kitty needs to go"
"Listen to that Devlin - sounds like a cat on heat"
"Omg - shes an ugly cow"
"Is that Fatima a bloke?"
"I could have got all them stars!"
by Sara Rabbit November 27, 2011
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Captain Sofa

A position of authority where you have full control of a sofa and who sits on it. Nobody is allowed to sit on the sofa unless they say, "Permission to board, sir?"
"Captain Sofa" originated from a Pickles comic:

Opal: *Sits on the sofa*

Earl: *Clears throat*

Opal: Forget it. I don't care if you ARE Captain Sofa. I'm not saying "Permission to board, sir?" every time I sit down here.
by Ubeenbamboozledson March 09, 2022
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sofa ski

A lady sits between two naked gentlemen on a sofa. She grips their ski poles in her hands and she's off on the down hill slalom, climaxing in two sticky white snow balls in her hands.
"We had a great night last night! Mary was sofa skiing with Dave and I"
by DonaldMcBigBottom November 05, 2009
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Sofa Dick

The condition in which the neurovascular and muscle tissues of the male sexual organ become atrophied resulting in decreased penile length and girth. Traditionally seen in middle aged overweight males after getting married.
That Priest definitely had sofa dick when he decided to leave the monastery.
by Biden’sSBPayUp$$$ October 29, 2021
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sofa jumping

Doing the horizontal shuffle at a house party whilst everyone else is asleep.
Me and Sandra were sofa jumping when you guys passed out last night.
by Gorby2.0 October 28, 2021
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