Male Pattern Laziness

Most often found in boys and men, it is the habit of exerting the least amount of effort and energy to accomplish a task, usually unsuccessfully.

Older Sister: Did you finish writing your resume for that job application?
Younger Brother: Yeah, here it is.
Older Sister: This is a mess.
Younger Brother: I couldn't find a good template, so I just made one up.
Older Sister: Um, well, here's a bunch I found on Google. Why was that so hard?
Younger Brother: It's not my fault, I have Male Pattern Laziness

Magazine Headline: Why Do Guys Date Skanks?
Reader 1: Can you believe they spent three pages on this?
Reader 2: That's three pages too many just to explain Male Pattern Laziness.

by Jellobelle June 01, 2012

Male-Pattern Autism

A condition that nearly every man suffers. It's noticeable when a guy gets sucked into one of his male behaviors that he channels his inner autist. A good example is when a guy will spending hours making strategy spreadsheets for his favorite game instead of talking to his hot girlfriend. He might also join a philosophy debate group and spend his Saturday nights talking to them instead of his hot girlfriend. You see where this is going.

Jim: "Dr. Fischer, then she said I loved the game more than her."

Dr. Fischer: "I'm seeing a pattern here. I think you may have male-pattern autism."

by MeaningChronicler September 05, 2023

male-pattern blindness

like male-pattern baldness but its dudes being unable to find shit thats in an obvious place.
typically solved by someone else (typically a female) pointing it out

Cyno: Where the fuck did I put my airpods case
Dehya: They're over here. God damn, male-pattern blindness hit you hard.

by fishgaming July 31, 2024