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I can tell you are doing it

I don't know what you are doing, but I can tell you are doing it wrong.

This is a humorous way to point out bad problem solving methods.
by I, Wreckerrr December 11, 2020
mugGet the I can tell you are doing itmug.

I won't tell if you don't

Convenient phrase used to assure any person being approached by an interested party that they made the right decision in initially turning them down them with the "sorry, I have a boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other of non-specific gender" line. Often followed by a cheeky wink, just to really bring it home.

The war-cry of the asshole.
Guy: "hey gorgeous, do you think I could take you out some time?"
Girl: "aw that's sweet, and I'm flattered, but I have a boyfriend"
Guy: "no sweat baby, I have a wife and three kids at home. I won't tell if you don't"
Girl: "oh gosh really? Thank goodness, that was my main concern. Pick me up at 7, and bring a three-pack of Durex"
by Heterochromia_biomedical September 9, 2018
mugGet the I won't tell if you don'tmug.

i could tell you, but then i'd have to kill you

a mob-like expression for the phrase "You will die if you hear my secret"
Guy 1: Duuuude, howdja get that Ipod touch?
Guy 2: i could tell you, but then i'd have to kill you
Guy 1: is that a no?
Guy 2: WTF was that supposed to mean?
Guy 1: you tell me,
Guy 2: NO!
by your best idiot May 23, 2010
mugGet the i could tell you, but then i'd have to kill youmug.

Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano?

A sexual copypasta about Ahsoka Tano from Star Wars, where Obi-Wan Kenobi tells Luke Skywalker about Ahsoka in sexual descriptions.
Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your father’s exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems.

Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while we’d even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi “training” of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics you’d get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as she’d do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal.

We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
by jordypresto0418 February 6, 2021
mugGet the Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano?mug.

"There's something I need to tell you" drama

Typical (usually teen) melodrama where nearly every episode includes the phrase "There's something I need to tell you". The "something" usually involves a previous lie, backstab, pregnancy, or other misdeed.
"I can't believe I just watched 7 episodes of 90210 in a row!"
"That's pretty sad... what do you think is wrong with you?"
"I don't know... I think I'm addicted to "There's something I need to tell you" dramas."
by liversounds July 14, 2014
mugGet the "There's something I need to tell you" dramamug.

"I have to tell you something" moment

The scene in movies and tv shows when one person is about to tell another person something, but the other person interrupts and says something that convinces the first person not to say anything. The other person usually finds out the truth anyway. This scene is being over used in tv shows and chick flicks
The classic "I have to tell you something" moment

Girl: (thinking) I don't want to go out with this guy, he's weird! I'm gonna break up with him.

Guy:hey how are you?

Girl:I have to tell you something.

Guy:me too... My aunt just died after a long, painful battle with cancer and her dying wish was for me to give you her priceless diamond ring. So what were you gonna tell me?

Girl:Uhhh... (in fake voice) I just wanted to say I'm so excited were going out yaayyy...
by afroman473 July 23, 2009
mugGet the "I have to tell you something" momentmug.

i like you so much I might actually tell you

Engineering Calculus:
As the tangent to the curve approaches infinity:
Variable Constraints Include:

Time
Location
Romantic Implication
Humourous Viability
Sexual Implication
Newton's Law

Results can be extrapolated by isolating one variable.
Ex.
Girl: I don't like ditzes.
Boy: I don't like ditzes either.
Girl: I like cheese
Boy: Mee too.
Girl: I like you so much I might actually tell you
x = romantic implication

Ex 2:

Boy: I like funny sarcastic bobble heads
Girl: I'm a funny sarcastic bobble head
Boy: I like you so much I might actually tell you
Girl: Ew you're creepy.
x = humourous viability + sexual implications

Ex 3:
Girl: Hi stranger, pay attention to me.
Boy: You're pretty.
Girl: I like you so much I might actually tell you.
Boy: Your positive?
x= newton's law, time, location
by JuneBugette December 7, 2010
mugGet the i like you so much I might actually tell youmug.

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