John Pesenti

A God among men. It is said that his power is so mighty that it cannot be matched by anything or anyone in any universe.

Person 1: Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!
Person 1: *Rock
Person 2: * John Pesenti
Person 1: No fair! nothing can beat John Pesenti

by trobbins September 15, 2011

Law of the Lesser Percentile

The law that states whichever phone is at a lower percent gets priority on the charger. Given there is only one charger, the lower percent gets access even if someone else is currently using it. They must give it up.

Tony, give me the charger! The Law of the lesser percentile states that you have to give it to me considering I’m at 12% and you’re at 45%!

by Con Land September 9, 2018

5 percent rule

After you break up with someone, you are not allowed to mourn over the loss for more than 5% of your time being with them.

The 5 percent rule goes like this: you can mourn over the loss of a boyfriend or girlfriend for no more of 5% iof the time being together (as previously stated). FOR EXAMPLE, if you dated someone for 60 minutes, you can mourn over your tragic loss for 3 minutes (if i did my math correctly)

by bellakaaay December 28, 2011

pedentify

To identify someone taking a shit in a bathroom stall by their shoes.

We’re you able to pedentify who blew up the toilet? It was John. I saw his Air Jordan’s in the stall while I was taking a piss.

by Mrshinnypants June 13, 2020

fifty percent chance I fuck your wife

Refers to a situation upon which there is a statistically binary outcome in the opportunity to have sex with an attractive married woman.

Person A - How do I know if there's a fifty percent chance I fuck your wife?
Person B - It's cool with me as long as it's cool with her and I'm allowed to watch!

by iMonkeyBIZ February 9, 2020

The Percentage Cult

Judged by the suicide rates of the trannys. usually degrading them. but also useful for those against them.

Man 1: hey, i heard what eve did to emile.
man 2: yeah, he had the unfair advantage because of his support in The Percentage Cult...
man3: yeah, Noble Four didn't deserve it.
man 2: like i said, the fucking Percentage Cult got his back.
man 1: we sound transphobic but he offended us, not we started it.

man 1: wait, what happened to Noble Two?
man 2: The Percentage Cult got that guy suspended.
man 1: fucking Percentage... always Aggressive and act like so fucking Oppressed...
man 3: they're basically an Empire now and we are Rebels.

by StormcloakODST May 21, 2021

33 percenter

A female that claims to be a virgin, yet only 33% of her relevant orifices remain pure. How special can it feel to be the first through the front door when the entire football team has been through the back door and explored the chimney already?

"She says she's a virgin but she's totally a 33 percenter. Just ask her about when she blew Scronaldo under the bleachers, or when she let your boy ZK, Alpengeist, Booms, and Brandopolis put it in the back door!"

by Count Christoph von Stoph-Stopherson August 8, 2007