one eyed snake

A stumpy/long and usually fat or skinny pink, brown or yellow sausage shaped snake that throws up when excited, usually after stroking it. The 'one-eye' is actually its mouth from where it spunks out spunk like a monkey spunky kiss it in the funky area.

by Shaggy October 7, 2003

one-eyed snake

I'm pretty sure it's another word for penis. Yea, it is. It's a fucking dick.

Jessica: I'd love to see what's in your pants. Is it big?

Charlie: Of course, I got a one-eyed snake.

by That dude with the large penis April 9, 2009

the one-eyed snake

Slang for a man's nether regions, the family jewel

I charmed the one-eyed snake a while ago.

by virgwith December 24, 2013

Patch the one eyed snake

To wank, or masturbate.

Uncle Herbert told me to patch the one eyed snake, so I went out looking for a one with a box of band-aids. I eventually got tired as I couldn't find it, so I ran behind a bush and masturbated furiously.

by JayReynolds November 6, 2007

flogged the one-eyed snake

Westerosi term for masturbated

"When I was twelve, I milked my eel into a pot of turtle stew. I flogged the one-eyed snake. I skinned my sausage. I made the bald man cry! makes masturbation gestures Into the turtle stew, which I do believe my sister ate. At least I hope she did."

- Tyrion Lannister

by rider-of-chaos February 12, 2019

petting the one eyed snake

the act of stroking your penis until a delightful load of love comes out.

Jeffrey's mom caught him petting the one eyed snake during the Britney Spears Video.

by markass May 3, 2006

One-Eyed Snake Salute

The one-eyed snake solute is a respectful gesture, mainly accomplished by people with a penis, where the penis is shown for a period of time.
This term bears resemblance to the Internet meme "Dicks out for Harambe"

Joel: "Hey Bobby-o, how'd you do on that test?"
Bobby: "I got a C dude, my best grade yet!"
Joel: "Fuck man; that deserves a one-eyed snake salute!"

by Emithises' Shit Post May 14, 2018