Take home the dogs

Go home to feed the dogs and let them out, then come pick me up at the titty bar

Hey woman, leave me a stack of ones and go take home the dogs. I need a lapdance.

by Cannibalizer March 24, 2015

taking a fat L

Completely and utterly messing up; losing badly to someone or something

"I suck at this game, I'm taking a fat L!" she complained, kicking the arcade game angrily.

by 807246 June 16, 2022

it takes two to Tandy

It takes two to Tandy is an uncommonly used turn of phrase used which is used in the context of when you want to Tandy by yourself but you need two.

Oh man I wish i could go Tandy but it takes two to Tandy... I'm talking to myself.

by Tiny fucking mr feet February 17, 2017

taking a number 4

Jacking off while taking a shit

Yo i just caught Justin taking a number 4

by Jagar21 March 15, 2018

You're taking a piss

Phrase used when expressing shock or confusion, as if saying "you're lying!" or "you can't be serious" or "i don't believe you!" in a positive way.

A: "i just got engaged!"
B: "stop! you're taking a piss!"

or

A: "i just got robbed"
B:"you're taking a damn piss, when did this happen??"

by Ru_ox May 14, 2023

Freddy Takes a Shit

A shitpost involving Freddy Fazbear from FNaF(Five Nights at Freddy's) taking a shit, until he is interrupted by Nightmare Fredbear from FNaF 4(Five Nights at Freddy's 4) slamming open the door, t-posing. FTaS(Freddy Takes a Shit) was written by the redditor u/Springlocked800080(now u/White_Rabbit800080) sometime in May of 2018.

Guy 1: "Hey have you read FTaS?"

Guy 2: "Freddy Takes a Shit? Yeah, no shit, it's the pinnacle of comedy!"

Guy 1: "Was that a pun?"

by Semen Huffer November 13, 2020

taking a mike johnson

Depositing fecal matter into a fecal matter cleanup and removal system, such as a toilet, where you would shat upon the toilet bowl, flushing into the shit drainage system.

"FUCK, I NEED TO GO TAKE A MIKE JOHNSON REALLY BAD. SHIT, I JUST TOOK A SHIT IN MY PANTS. taking a mike johnson"

"I just took a KILLER mike johnson. taking a mike johnson."

by MikeJohnson November 02, 2013