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Monkey sock

a sports sock that is placed over the males erect phalice so not to spray his body with sticky white love piss and cut down on cleaning time. It helps as an extra time saver when having a danger wank!
mum: why is this sock so stiff billy!
billy: (embarrased) it's my monkey sock!
by mike March 19, 2004
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monkey bite

overlapping of thumb and middle finger under the pointer finger. used as a pinching technique. grab someones skin between thumb and top of middle finger, it will hurt. this is not called a turtle bite.
monkey bite, bite, pinch, ouch, squeek
by monkey biter March 14, 2010
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Ninja Monkeys

minions of evil usally working for little more than bananas
good samuri: i will defete you!!

bad samuri: we'll see if you can get past my NINJA MONKEYS!!!
by Matt-man September 17, 2004
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monkey walk

the way you walk when you go to take a shit and then realize that there is no toilet paper so you have to half squat and waddle to go get more toilet paper in order to keep shit from spreading all over your ass.
Eric: Dude theres no fuckin toilet paper in the bathroom
Karl: There was some TP in my room
Eric: Yeah I know, I did the monkey walk to grab it so I didnt get shit all over my ass
by E-Janks March 14, 2010
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Bench Monkey

Someone who has abnormally large pecs, most likely to the Bench Press being their most commonly used piece of equipment at a Gym.

A bench monkey will have The Incredible Hulk's chest and Uma Thurman's body.

Frowned upon at gyms, they are almost laughed at even by Guidos for occasionally taking roids despite the fact they lack all other muscles.
- Man walks into Gym does bench press leaves -

Tony says: Damn, what a Bench Monkey.

- Man overhears this, comes back in, and tries to lift a man's Bicep Curl Bar from the floor and fails before walking out -

Tony says: That's what I thought.
by R3POWER October 30, 2009
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grep monkey

1. Someone who performs mundane tasks everyday, just like a white blood cell. The "Fodder Consciousness" Theory.
2. Someone good at looking for a needle in a hay stack.
3. Grep Grok's biatch.
4. A person who is always searching for and finding answers.
1. Behind every great mind....there is a grep monkey.
2. What looks to be a long day gets much easier when you have a grep monkey around.
3. I told you what I need, now get to it you grep monkey.
4. Nothing gets past that grep monkey.
by AdZd January 28, 2007
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Counter Monkey

People who always sit at the counter in a trendy coffee house.
Zookeeper: Those two hippies are always at the counter staring blindly at the espresso machine!
Mike: Yeah, they are such counter monkeys.
by Val April 9, 2002
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