A condition that certain clients will have, causing them to occasionally disregard their manners when contacting a sex worker in an attempt to schedule a booking. Individuals having a dick emergency will often not pay proper attention to screening instructions, will attempt to schedule same-day even if policies state that's not offered, and will sometimes even lose grasp of basic grammar.
ring ring
sex worker: "Hello?"
client: "What are your rates?!?"
sex worker: "WOW. OK, let's start with your name first?"
client: "I'm Chad... can you accept me for a booking this afternoon?!?"
sex worker: "OK, I can see that someone is having a dick emergency today... but let's not totally forget our manners, shall we?"
client: "Sorry, yes. So may I please inquire as to your rates?"
sex worker: "They're pretty clearly stated on my web site."
client: "Where is that?"
sex worker: "You managed to find my contact info online... I'm confident that you can find this information, as well. Along with my screening process. Thank you."
click
sex worker: "Hello?"
client: "What are your rates?!?"
sex worker: "WOW. OK, let's start with your name first?"
client: "I'm Chad... can you accept me for a booking this afternoon?!?"
sex worker: "OK, I can see that someone is having a dick emergency today... but let's not totally forget our manners, shall we?"
client: "Sorry, yes. So may I please inquire as to your rates?"
sex worker: "They're pretty clearly stated on my web site."
client: "Where is that?"
sex worker: "You managed to find my contact info online... I'm confident that you can find this information, as well. Along with my screening process. Thank you."
click
by demergency July 8, 2019
Get the dick emergencymug. Something you save for an emergency, like stashing chocolate in your desk for a major craving or keeping an umbrella in your car in case it rains.
I remember going on date during a hike and pulling out a thin tubular flashlight when my date asked me what it was for I mentioned it was my emergency cock.
by C12H22O11 June 22, 2022
Get the Emergency cockmug. Ted looked across the drunken hoard at the bar; it had been a while and he needed to find an emergency girlfriend.
by Overtheunder September 20, 2016
Get the emergency girlfriendmug. When you eat a cookie or brownie and suddenly NEED milk to satisfy your taste buds so you stop whatever you are doing and all out sprint to the fridge destroying everything in your path to satisfy the urge in the short window that it lasts.
I stiff armed grandma on the way to the kitchen to get a gulp of milk because I had a milk emergency while eating a brownie in the basement while playing minecraft and jerking off.
by milkman262 December 18, 2013
Get the milk emergencymug. An Indoor Emergency is the causality of an ironic anxiety when looking at the outside from the inside. The emergency that we are grappling with in this space is a suffering from a perpetual, systematic disconnection from nature.
2020 was a shared indoor emergency: a feeling of helplessness from an isolation not only away from people but also from natural environments.
by AcyrlicAstroTurf March 13, 2021
Get the Indoor Emergencymug. by BootyWarrior99 March 13, 2020
Get the National Emergencymug. by Verboser284 April 20, 2020
Get the Emergency Suicidemug.