Tale of Whoa!

A story of compound misfortunes so unlikely that the listener responds with terminal skepticism.

He listened respectfully at first, filled with compassion, tears forming in his eyes as she narrated having been abandoned as an infant, left in a dumpster high in the Sierra-Nevadas, rescued by dumpster-diving circus riders who put her, untethered, on the back of a jumping stallion every night till she was sixteen. Years later, escaping one night off the coast of San Diego she waded into the ocean, hoping to end it all, only to be netted by Tijuana shrimp fishermen who forced her to peel shrimp for years in a rickety boat, the best life she's ever known, before falling overboard in a hurricane and washing ashore in San Francisco at the precise moment an 7.4 earthquake hit. How she got to the Greyhound station in Sparks she was still unclear, and could he spare a hundred bucks to help her find her rightful family, whom, she believed, might at this moment be remorsefully searching for her on the outskirts of Death Valley. By now dry-eyed and stone-hearted, he reached into his wallet for a five, which he slipped into the outer pocket of her spangled handbag and, not looking back, hopped quickly onto his bus while she prattled on with her Tale of Whoa!

by Monkey's Dad July 6, 2021

Whoa-mance

female version of "bromance"
two females completely relating on a level that is totally heterosexual yet mentally stimulating, witty even.

feeding off eachothers wittiness and crackin jokes, we realized this was the start of a beautiful "whoa-mance"

by mskonception September 30, 2009

Whoa Dennis

When someone acts or behaves out of character

The person in front of me at McDonalds started screaming at the cashier so I said "Whoa Dennis"

by Nein Buck June 30, 2024

whoa, is that a chimichanga?!

A person that perceives their surroundings as an infinite ploom of color and desires a LOT of baked goods. They tend to enjoy Adele and eating chocolate chip infused pumpkin bread. This type of person inserts terms like " pish posh, toothbrushing, and you're being a cotton headed ninny muggins!" most frequently. They only correspond through telegrams and handcrafted letters flown by the elite species of pigeon.

"Hey Bill!"

"Are you going to go toothbrushing today?"

"i dont know. whoa, is that a chimichanga?!"

"BY GOD IT IS!!!!!!!!"

by chimisenior April 6, 2019

what? whoa!

What? Whoa! is a term used to describe surprise at something not really surprising.

A: This car will detect when it’s time to change to Daylight Savings Time.

B: What? Whoa!

by lovebitesdarling January 13, 2019

Whoa whoa whoa

To stop someone from misunderstanding a situation. "Let me explain"

Whoa whoa whoa, I wasn't with Barabara last night so your assumption is incorrect.

by Meth Guzzler August 7, 2023

Whoa ho

A melancholy expression asking the world, the universe, and life to slow down and stop.

She sat down and thought about all the tragedy and endless stress going on around her, and not wanting anything else to come and add to it, she let out a sigh and said "Whoa ho".

by Arche Logos December 23, 2020