Wank-Fu

The ancient mystical art of turning any nerd, ginger tosspot, or simpering twat into a killing machine simply by watching Steven Seagal movies on repeat.
Hey, Gavin I just watched Under Siege five times and now I'm cooking up some painful payback on my asshole big brother, I'm gonna go full Wank-Fu on his ass.
by MrAubergine March 07, 2014
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Femi wank

When a female pleasures themselves.
Isobel: I was so horny when I woke up that I had to have a femi wank
by Jess McMinn April 10, 2012
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Wholesome Wank

The act of beating your meat to porn not involving fetishes.

This is often performed after feeling guilty about watching regret porn
A good wholesome wank is basically confessions for atheists.
by The ideal God April 18, 2018
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Koala Wank

Where a girl effectivley hugs the penis similar to the tit wank but with more cwtching. Similar to how a koala climbs a tree
Patch: "dude i got a dutch rudder last night!"
Jamie: " thats nothing i got a koala wank!!!"
by BlossomFM&TheWalrus November 24, 2009
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Welsh wank

Welsh wank Is where you have sex with your sister while wearing a sheep Coat
Welsh wank is Fuckin your sister in a sheep skin jacket
by Seven47 August 28, 2022
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sneak wank

When someone is in a call with someone (I.e. Skype or Teamspeak) and then they start wanking off and talking to them at the same time, without making any noise.
A: Did you know that most of the times we talk I'm sneak wanking?
B: Tmi , didn't need to know that bro.
by Joel6909 February 05, 2017
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nanny wank

This is a new and popular style of music and dress, it's origins are unclear but it either emerged in Eastern America or Southern England where it is rife. Bands that fall into this include, the Strokes, The Delays, Keane, etc. It requires forward facing greasy hair, bad tailoring, knotted scarves and insecurity.
"CHRIST! TURN OFF THAT BEDWETTING LOAD OF NANNYWANK BEFORE THE DOG KILLS ITSELF" - my father 2005
by Simon Trosper January 20, 2005
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