christmas salad

When you go to the mall sit on the piece of shit they have playing Santa and accidently slide between his knees and he has a gay little elf named Tim ready to eat the groceries.
Hey Jan, did you notice the way Tim was ready to eat your christmas salad as soon as you slid of old saint nicks lap.
by Ishootupbagels December 10, 2017
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Christmas Derangement Syndrome describes a fanatical and borderline psychotic obsession with all things "Christmas," specifically the American style celebration which centers around mindless consumerism and the glorification of kitsch. This celebration has little to do with the birth of one Jesus of Nazareth, the prominent figure in Judeo-Christianity.

Symptoms of CDS are as follows

1) wanting or actively binge watching cheesy hallmark channel christmas movies all year long
2) wanting or actively listening to cheesy christmas music all year long
3) decorating the exterior of one's dwelling in christmas lights and displays as soon as they appear on store shelves, which typically in August or September
4) being absolutely delighted when retail stores start putting out christmas displays in August
5) frequenting the all-year christmas decoration stores, or discussing wanting to go
6) keeping a "holiday tree" up all year long as thinly veiled excuse to keep their abode christmasy
7) refusing to acknowledge that the fall/autumn and winter seasons exist, it's "christmas season"
8) frequently announces how many days, weeks, months, sleeps, or Fridays it is until christmas, even if it's December 26th
9) stocking up on a year's supply of their favorite christmas fragrances at Bath & Body Works so they can use them all year long
10) firmly believes "the war on christmas" is real

There is no known treatment for Christmas Derangement Syndrome at this point in time.
Person 1: OMG I CAN'T WAIT FOR CHRISTMAS!!! I'M GONNA START DECORATING RIGHT NOW!!!
Person 2: it is July and it is 100 degrees outside, you don't need to decorate for christmas, you have Christmas Derangement Syndrome, and you need help.
by ProteasNG November 29, 2024
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Christmas Valley

Little country town in south central Oregon where there’s vast fields of green. A destination where the locals know each other by name and famous for cowboy dinner tree. As old as time and sightseeing from beginning of time.

Don’t come here we don’t want you here.

Quit stealing stuff to, your pissing people off.
The sand dunes in Christmas Valley are super fun to ride on.
by Sagebrush Boy July 21, 2023
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Christmas asshole

It means your an asshole every other day besides Christmas
You such an Christmas asshole
by Who_shall_be named October 07, 2020
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Christmas Face

A sour, unhappy face caused by driving in holiday traffic, shopping in over crowded malls, spending more money than one can afford on Christmas.
Mom just got back from shopping. She's got her Christmas Face on.
by HoHoNo December 11, 2010
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SLUTTY CHRISTMAS 😘

Slutty Christmas is that special time of year for baddies worldwide. 😍😍😍
"🎄🎄MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCHES🎄🎄!! Now that it’s finally DICKmas 👅💦Santa’s about to slide 🎅🏾😉 down your hot 🔥 hot 🔥chimney tonight. So lick 💦💋those juicy candy canes and drink up that creamy eggnog🍼, it’s about to get wet down at Santa’s workshop🍆🍆! Don’t forgot to slide down that XXXtra 🎅🏾🎅🏾 big North Pole, and make sure your 🍪 cookie 🍪is yummy enough for Santa to eat👄! 👀 But are you bad enough to handle Santa’s giant juicy 8=candy👊🏼COCK=D💦?? Send this to 🔟 of your baddest bitch elves💁🏼💁🏾 If you get 5️⃣ back, youre on the naughty list this year🍆💦! If you get 🔟 back you better be ready for Santa’s hot ♨️CUMlate☕️💦😭 If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back you’ve got the most bitchin 🍬peppermint 🍬pussy in the North Pole! ❄️⛄ Hope you get to blow 🌬 lots of XXXmas 🎄dick, and that you get lots of XXXmas 🎄CUMMIES 💝💝 HAVE A SLUTTY CHRISTMAS 😘 / DICKMAS 💦🍆👅 YOU HOE HOE HOE!!! 🎅🏾🎅🏿🎅🏽🎅🏼"
by #1 Mordetwi fangirls December 25, 2021
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