gabriel jesus

The best Brazilian baller 5 star skills, top star pace and weak foot best premier league player and man city.
Best footballer

Damn this kid is such a gabriel jesus he is so fast and pacy

by bossgamer April 10, 2017

jesus slut

A girl who is incredibly religious and claims to be pure and holy, but also loves a huge helping of (usually black) dick.

"Did you hear about Stacy? Apparently after church she got rammed by three black dudes behind Wal-Mart. What a jesus slut."

by superdupernova September 12, 2013

jesus on wheels

1.) used to express the extreme awesomeness, coolness, or kickassery or an object.

2.) can also be used sarcasticly to exemplify the gayiety or lack of awesomeness, coolness, or kickassery.

1.) "Holy shit, that's jesus on wheels." "Drury is jesus on wheels."

2.) "look at that douchebag walking around like he's jesus on wheels."

by Day June 16, 2007

Jesus freak

Someone who tries to be both part of an anti-social subculture (see punk for a good example) and a Christian, not realizing that you can't support the ideals used in punk and be a Jesus follower at the same time.

I'm very punk, but I can't have sex, do drugs, or listen to any rock n' roll music that doesn't praise the Lord because I'm a Jesus freak.

by Janis February 6, 2005

clevland jesus

The most degrading of sexual acts. One partner crucifies the other and then shits on his\her chest.

Jane nailed Dick to a cross and then shit all over his chest. CLEVLAND JESUS FTW!

by jr jesus February 17, 2008

Jesus Hole

1. The hole in Jesus' side or hand when used for sexual pleasure. See crucifuck.
2. Texas Governor Rick Perry's nickname for his Prison Wallet.

Rick Santorum was so horny he was obsessed with getting him some Jesus Hole (a crucifuck). Unfortunately, Jesus had been MIA for 2000 years and Santorum had to go off to the bathhouse for some pussy on a stick. Having left his Mormon Panty Liners at home he left with a Mormon Trail of santorum in his Mormon Underwear.

by Cuntoleezza Rice August 25, 2011

Jesus Ponies

Jesus ponies are a joke name for dinosaurs. Many creationists claim that dinosaurs are mentioned in the Bible and that they either existed a few thousand years ago and were wiped out by the flood or that they are still around in remote parts of the world unexplored by Westerners. Sara palin has said she believes in Jesus Ponies

Aww look at the dinosaurs...
Dude those are Jesus Ponies.

by A.L.L.People December 2, 2011