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Jesus Virus

A virus you can get from a porn site. Because Jesus does not want you looking at porn.
13 year old kid: Man, I got a jesus Virus the other day.
Other person: Did your parents find out?
13 yr old kid: Nah I have a porn eraser.
by TheNewJTM1 July 20, 2009
mugGet the Jesus Virusmug.

Jesus

your, savior. He came down to earth to pay the price for your sins. He loves you more than you could ever imagine, and can change your life if you turn to him.

the son of God
Jesus is my savior
by Thatchristiangirl September 7, 2020
mugGet the Jesusmug.

Jesus

The Son of God. Nuff said.

Popular biographies:

Gospel of Matthew
Gospel of Mark
Gospel of Luke
Gospel of John
Jesus: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength... Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these." (Mark 12:30-31)

Humanity's Response: "Crucify him!" (Luke 23:21)
by South Pacific Brother November 9, 2017
mugGet the Jesusmug.

Jesus freak

This is a phrase which i believe should be explained in this song, which was written by dcTalk and is from the album "Jesus Freak" that sold platinum in 1995:

Separated, I cut myself clean
From a past that comes back in my darkest of dreams
Been apprehended by a spiritual force
And a grace that replaced all the me I've divorced

I saw a man with tat on his big fat belly
It wiggled around like marmalade jelly
It took me a while to catch what it said
Cause I had to match the rhythm
Of his belly with my head
'Jesus Saves' is what it raved in a typical tattoo green
He stood on a box in the middle of the city
And claimed he had a dream


(chorus)
What will people think
When they hear that I'm a Jesus freak
What will people do when they find that it's true
I don't really care if they label me a Jesus freak
There ain't no disguising the truth

Kamikaze, my death is gain
I've been marked by my Maker
A peculiar display
The high and lofty, they see me as weak
Cause I won't live and die for the power they seek

There was a man from the desert with naps in his head
The sand that he walked was also his bed
The words that he spoke made the people assume
There wasn't too much left in the upper room
With skins on his back and hair on his face
They thought he was strange by the locusts he ate
The Pharisees tripped when they heard him speak
Until the king took the head of this Jesus freak

(repeat chorus 2x)

People say I'm strange, does it make me a stranger
That my best friend was born in a manger
People say I'm strange, does it make me a stranger
That my best friend was born in a manger

(repeat chorus 2x)

What will people think
(What will people think)
What will people do
(What will people do)
I don't really care
(What else can I say)
There ain't no disguising the truth
(Jesus is the way)
Yeah, i'm 16, a Christian and i'm not scared of being treated like crap because of my faith. Oh, and i'm not American or fundamentalist.
by Christian dude January 5, 2005
mugGet the Jesus freakmug.

White Jesus

"Hey man, I am done partying -- I'm off to bed."

"No dude, lets crack out the White Jesus."
by Jiggle Swami December 27, 2011
mugGet the White Jesusmug.

Crap Jesus

Someone who keeps quoting borrowed, dull and moronic parables (simple stories that pretend to illustrate moral or religious lessons.)
Deepak Chopra is a non-stop Crap Jesus.
by rperazag July 26, 2010
mugGet the Crap Jesusmug.

Sneaky Jesus

A Sneaky Jesus is sex so hard and fast that only jesus could have done it!
"Hey, i have just gave that dude a Sneaky Jesus!" Ha Ha
by Z-J June 13, 2007
mugGet the Sneaky Jesusmug.

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