Centene Time Warp Theory(CTWT)

Centene Time Warp Theory, or CTWT, is the phenomenon experienced by company employees that proposes that time is not as it is perceived it to be, i.e, minute for minute and second for second as expected. It is in fact a far higher ratio that isn't known until a work week is complete. There is no known formula to calculate this ratio prior to the end of a scheduled shift and is to this point, only a feeling experienced by those exposed. Any one person may have a different feeling that is dependent on their level of exposure.

There is currently no known cure for CTW sickness other than rest and time away from your job.

Pauly had a long week at work. He told Larry and Freddy that he was happy the week was over.

Pauly: Man I'm glad this week is over.

Freddy: Pauly, it's only Monday afternoon.

Pauly: No way, it feels like it's been a week already.

Larry: Pauly, let me educate you on Centene Time Warp Theory(CTWT). It makes you feel like you've worked an exponentially higher number of hours in a short period of time.

by LabwarzLarry February 1, 2023

Invisible string theory

The theory that everyone, everywhere, in the world is somehow connected by an “invisible string”, particularly lovers.

This theory is inspired by the Taylor Swift song “invisible string”, in which she describes the ways her and her lover were connected before they even met.

Person A: I found my current boyfriend in the background of one of the photos I took in 2013!
Person B: Wow! What a coincidence!
Person C: Actually, that’s the invisible string theory. Y’all are soulmates

by Jessienewyorknanny January 26, 2024

Hasson theory

The Hasson theory is most commonly used to describe those that are blessed with a nice arse but have a face that could turn Medusa to stone, so if you see a girl with these attributes it is known as the Hasson theory. Spread the word booty face bum nose noon spoon

A man sees a nice girls ass and he is like danggg and then he looks at the face and he knows to think of the Hasson theory and be like that girls got a nice ass but not a nice face

by Steve? June 5, 2016

life history theory

This theory refers to the idea exposure to an unpredictable, impoverished environment as a kid leads to faster development whereas children who grow up in a stable environment with more resources tend to have a slower developmental course.

According to the life history theory, families with more means often have more anticipation of years of schooling and career before one necessarily has to “grow up”—there’s plenty of time for that later.

by Emotional Cruiser October 23, 2025

Macgyver Theory

The belief that using random, available things to try to make something work will actually work.

Allison uses the MacGyver Theory at her portrait studio. Like, "Get me my snorkel, an avocado, and some dead tree branches. This is going to be the best baby portrait EVER!"

by Realtalk12 May 18, 2015

Light’s Theory

The Theory is,
In the next universe, the next fastest thing will be tilgh at the speed of 4,181,814,184.81015KM/S.

Light’s Theory, or Tilgh Theory, is the next universe’s biggest theory’s result at the speed of 4.1 billion.

by Wargom July 2, 2024

Opposite Day Theory

Opposite Day Theory states that Opposite Day is not merely a day. Instead, it supposes that Opposite Day is fluid and triggers when it is invoked. If they wish, debaters may invoke opposite day for exactly the next eight minutes by quoting the following: Three, Two, One, Go!

"The order is twelve off with four hidden a-specs, the rules of Risk: The Game of Global Domination, Drop the Judge, stabbing theory, the N-word repeated for two minutes, and Opposite Day theory.

by ougrhough September 12, 2025