My two favourite things are commitment and changing myself

Possibly the best non-joke pickup line of all time

Girl: I just don't know if I'm ready for a relationshipment.
Boy: Hey cmon. My two favourite things are commitment and changing myself.

by Smeeagain October 31, 2011

i would rather eat my own toe

A very good phrase to use when you dont want to do something

Person one: Hey will you go out with me?

Person two: Ummm well to be quite honest with you i would rather eat my own toe!

by Tom Griffiths February 24, 2008

my ma knows your da

Meaning my mother knows your father. Normally said to a friend.

Im gonna ride the bollocks off yer ma all nite long while shes lying on her side and im spoonin her like i spoon ur da every friday nite! my ma knows your da and im gonna ride the fuck out of ur ma so hard her shit will come out her ears for the next 6 weeks.

by Skitsofrenic mudda fukka December 14, 2007

put my french bread in your dutch oven

Having oral sex.

Can i put my french bread in your dutch oven?

by Broski Jagerbombsman August 30, 2010

I just Wanna Dance and Wave My Hammer

When there is a lot going on and you just want to dance and have a good time. Hammer is interchangeable for any item that is in your hand when you are ready to dance.

Geoffrey: Oh my god, this meeting is so boring.
Lauren: Are we ever gonna get to the club?
Donovan: I know I just wanna dance and wave my hammer.
Meng: Me too, CFW

by HoldenPhrases June 10, 2011

suck my cock , ill murder your family!

Something you say when you or your fave team is losing. there is no counter dis to suck my cock , ill murder your family.

this phrase may also be used to rattle complete strangers on the metro.

bitch: i beleive you were traveling good sir.

you:O im terribly sorry.

bitch: yes well its quite alright

you: suck my cock , ill murder your family!

by Thomas Cornelius Johnston III November 12, 2012

You gotta be pulling my pants down kid!

When something happens and it makes such little sense that a little kid running up to you and pulling your pants down seems more logical.

Jeff - "Hey Tom, did you hear that billy is going out with your ex?"
Tom - "You gotta be pulling my pants down kid!"

by Ican'tbeleiveitsnotOXYCLEAN November 7, 2009