mound stretcher

A particularly long, thick, and hard penis commonly found on gentlemen north of Hadrian's wall.

Tell me Mrs. McTavish, you said that your new born son weighed 25 lbs at birth yet three weeks later, he now weighs only 15 lbs. what happened? "Oh, we had his mound stretcher circumsized your majesty".

by Baffersty March 7, 2018

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Get the mound stretchermug.

Flower Mound

Demon women and children that go around being funded by their cash pig daddies. Ungrateful for everything, never polite and boasting about bullying others. The nosiest people you will ever meet. You got too drunk Saturday? They already told all the other dark entities that lurk. Ready to shame you like Queen Cersei completing her walk of atonement. They think they are better than the whole DFW area. Making eye contact won’t be hard for their demon eyes are already mean mugging you for breathing THIER air. They will pray for you to be damned in hell if you honk at them. Even though they’ve been finishing a text in front of you at a green light. Karen doesn’t like you? Nobody does. She wins in these statures. Think Jesus is here to protect you? They think they are God so they always make the rules. Imagine the underworld in Stranger Things; that’s what it feels to be a Flower Mound. The best thing to ever due is cleanse yourself and leave. The anger and hate isn’t worth your health.

“I’m feeling stuck in Flower Mound”
“Dude, you might need therapy. What can I do to get you out?”

by Thereaper777 June 21, 2023

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