"Hey Geoff, how was sex with Tami last night?"
"Keith, it was dirty as f*ck, she asked me to give her a Chocolate Hotpocket!"
"I don't know how to respond to that, Geoff."
"Keith, it was dirty as f*ck, she asked me to give her a Chocolate Hotpocket!"
"I don't know how to respond to that, Geoff."
by WetTrumpPanko March 25, 2023
Get the chocolate hotpocket mug.The act of feeding your girl laxatives, corking her stinker and then stuffing an assortment of deli meats and cheeses inside her cunt before pounding her until she pops like a hot pocket in a microwave.
Brittany, I let Gavin give me a Muddy Hotpocket last night and now my box smells like thanksgiving at grams house.
by MissMonk April 19, 2021
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A Hotpocket is a small, invasive species, closely resembling that of a bread-encrusted, cheese-filled delicacy.
I regret to inform the readers of this article that this is not the case. The Hotpocket is not a food, it is an alien species of which we know very little.
First I will start off by describing the anatomy of the Hotpocket. In one case, we dissected a specimen, and to our dismay, we found no headway in our research.
This is because the Hotpocket does not possess any of the internals we would expect. No digestive system, circulatory or otherwise.
Despite not having a reproductive system, they reproduce, despite not appearing to have reproductive organs. The offspring, as we would refer to them- Are pizza rolls.
Now, based on the fact that a Hotpocket doesn't possess a reproductive system, and in the well-known herds of twelve that they travel in, having spotted no difference between any of them, we have assumed that they are all one gender, and reproduce asexually.
It also appears that they have many offspring at once, supported by the fact that the Pizza Rolls outnumber Hotpockets by nearly tenfold. It is assumed that only a small number of Pizza Rolls survive to maturation.
They seem to thrive in only cold conditions, as if left out they go soft, a sure sign that it's died.
(Look for Part Two, couldn't fit all in character limit)
A Hotpocket is a small, invasive species, closely resembling that of a bread-encrusted, cheese-filled delicacy.
I regret to inform the readers of this article that this is not the case. The Hotpocket is not a food, it is an alien species of which we know very little.
First I will start off by describing the anatomy of the Hotpocket. In one case, we dissected a specimen, and to our dismay, we found no headway in our research.
This is because the Hotpocket does not possess any of the internals we would expect. No digestive system, circulatory or otherwise.
Despite not having a reproductive system, they reproduce, despite not appearing to have reproductive organs. The offspring, as we would refer to them- Are pizza rolls.
Now, based on the fact that a Hotpocket doesn't possess a reproductive system, and in the well-known herds of twelve that they travel in, having spotted no difference between any of them, we have assumed that they are all one gender, and reproduce asexually.
It also appears that they have many offspring at once, supported by the fact that the Pizza Rolls outnumber Hotpockets by nearly tenfold. It is assumed that only a small number of Pizza Rolls survive to maturation.
They seem to thrive in only cold conditions, as if left out they go soft, a sure sign that it's died.
(Look for Part Two, couldn't fit all in character limit)
- Above is an except from the Catalogue of Earth-Invasive Species (On the subject of Hotpockets), by an anonymous author
by Zombiman August 11, 2025
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Johnny fucking loves hotpocketing. He's lucky we put up with it.
Johnny fucking loves hotpocketing. He's lucky we put up with it.
by sabrina pemberton August 3, 2021
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