Chocolate Jesus

A formed chocolate bar in the shape of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ

I gave that self rightious preachy fat bitch a chocolate Jesus for Christmas. She loved it and then ate Christ's head.

by [e-mail] December 24, 2004

Jesus Christ

An exclamation gemerally used to express anguish or dismay.

Jim: Some mo fo just keyed your ride dude !
Bob: JESUS CHRIST ! !

or

In poker your straight loses to a full house and you exclaim JESUS CHRIST ! !

by MDog221 July 15, 2006

Jesus Chillers

Also referred to as "JC's"

1- Freakishly comfortable flip-flops, or throwback style moccasin type footwear that one wears when bummin' it. (Like the stuff they wore in biblical days)

2- That group of motivated religious types which inhabit every college campus, have weekly meetings under the same shade tree, and attempt to lure in unsuspecting students at the nearby soda machines.

AFTER A LONG NIGHT:

Skyler: "Yo kev, lets hit up some brunch"
Kevin: "Cool, lemme get down on my Jesus chillers"
Skyler: "tight"

by SDGofNEWPORT January 6, 2009

Cabbage jesus

A overweight cunt who is full of life and loves to joke around with anyone. He loves to make friends and will even share his lunch with you. He will go out of his way for anyone!

Bro 1: did u just see that guy? he just gave the homeless family 100 dollars!
Bro 2: yeah! he always does that his name is cabbage jesus..
Bro 1: what a mad cunt we should meet him sometime..

Bro 2: hell yeah!

by Cabbage jesus May 12, 2019

Dirty Jesus

Much like the Dirty Sanchez, but in the Missionary Position.

much like the dirty sanchez, but yet not... more like the Dirty Jesus

by PabloHyde October 4, 2011

Jesus sandals

When a grown man with a beard wear a pair of leather flip flops

(Man) Hey check out my new sandals honey

(Wife) you mean jesus sandals

by Funnyguy32 February 28, 2016

Golden Jesus

Pure pharmaceutical grade heroin (diacetylmorphine).

The term was first coined in the autobiographical book `Candy´ by Luke Davies (and subsequently the movie `Candy´ starring Heath Ledger and Abbie Cornish), when the character Casper (Geoffrey Rush) a lecturing chemist & sometime opiate user synthesizes his own `Golden Jesus´ (diacetylmorphine) from Panadine Forte.

by Chemgirl January 3, 2010