turtle dove

a small, flightless bird resembling a pigeon with a turtle shell on its back. It is almost completely useless, and lives in a tree all its life owing to the fact if it tries to jump down it will die (the turtle shell means it is too heavy to fly). Their diet composes of leaves, fruit, and any cat/monkey/other that climbs their tree.

how are your turtle doves doing, Dave?
Not very well, Bill. One of them swallowed my cat.

by unoriginally November 22, 2020

cloggerhead turtle

fecal matter that feels as if it is coming out of the anus and, when released, severely clogs a toilet.

Sam Excuse me sir, but i just pushed out a cloggerhead turtle in there...you're gonna need to get a plunger.

Middle school janitor You little bastard.

by Randall Zinchowski September 11, 2010

Turtle Tracks

Turtle tracks are when a chick with exceptionally long meat curtains, a.k.a pussy lips walks on the beach in sand dragging her meat curtains leaving a trail like a turtle does, one would call that turtle tracks!

Sara wanted to take a break from all her promiscuity and take a walk on the beach. Little did she know she was leaving turtle tracks in the sand for all her guy friends to follow.

by Shucky Kunt February 10, 2019

turtle dumping

Over a period of time your relationships crumbles slow and steadily, starting with disagreement and great displeasure ending it off with just complete boredom between the relationships.

Tim: Amy you're so boring, fucking stop arguing with me.
Amy: no you stop.
2 months later
Tim:...I hate you...
Amy:...I hate you too...
Tim: good were finally agreeing and im turtle dumping you.

Amy: ok good!

by laurenthecoochieinspector November 23, 2013

Turtle shagger

1. A person who is very bad at shagging
dem hoes

Dude 1: smell yer maw
Dude 2: shut up you turtle shagger

by TheDeadskull777 September 9, 2020

Turtle’s Tail

The opposite of a turtle’s head. Having made it to the lavatory, dropped a big one and flushed. The turtle’s tail can be found lurking on the consumer side of the U bend.

Dad: Bloody hell! Who’s left this turtle’s tail in ‘ere!

by Dfsjdjdj December 5, 2020

pubical turtles

When ones pubic hair is shaped weird

" she has such weird pubical turtles "

by pinecones123 February 28, 2018