...I did something

The noise you hear before your friend is about to tell you that they zip tied their two big toes together.

Phone rings:
Friend 1: Hey what's up, you never call me?

Friend 2: ...I did something

Friend 1: Damn it, not again. Are you at least near scissors this time?

Friend 2: well um... funny story, I was going on a hike in the woods and I found a zip tie in my bag...

Friend 1: so what you're saying is you're in the middle of the woods alone with your big toes zip tied together?

Friend 2: Uhm... yeah pretty much...

Friend 1: (bursts out laughing) Well have fun with that, this is gonna be a fun story to tell my parents (hangs up)

Friend 2: Wait what do you mean tell your parents? Hello? Don't leave me here.

by IDK1234583 July 9, 2024

Flag

Get the ...I did something mug.

I like swords

1. A reference to Nuklear Power's web comic 8 Bit Theater where the Fighter repeats the phrase to the Guard, who can only reply "Welcome to Cornelia." Used to show automatic responses in nerdy groups and express disinterest in the topic.

2. Way of saying you prefer penis to pussy

Guy 1: Want to hear about my surgery?
Guy 2: No.
Guy 1: Well it went great.
Guy 2: I like swords
Guy 1: *continues to go on
Guy 2: *Every few minutes I like swords

Girl: Who are you here with tonight?
Gay guy: I like swords

by Tweedle_the_Bard January 17, 2020

Flag

Get the I like swords mug.

I👈 don't want to hear it

And I don't want to hear it from a solipsistic incest cultists that it's my ✌️✊️✌️Role✌️✊️✌️ in life to be consumed for labor and that if I don't do you incest cult then your just get to sit there while this motherfucker tries to rob me.

Hym "No I👈 don't want to hear it, incest freak. Hey, I got a question for you..."

by Hym Iam December 31, 2024

Flag

Get the I👈 don't want to hear it mug.

I

No matter what I do…
I wish I was with you…
A smile I could always see…
Laughing we could share…
Memories we would make…
Together ❤️
Yep… totally eating cake:)
And the arms!!!!

I cant stop loving you…
Even if I tried!!!
I am in love with you!
This will not change …
Love like this doesn’t change….
It doesn’t matter what happens…
Through and through I will love you!!!!

We will share cake:)

This is a promise I will make!!!!
Just as I will love you no matter the date…
As I will always pray to see you when I wake ❤️

by Just a girl with ❤️ for 1 December 6, 2024

Flag

Get the I mug.

i never really spoke to him

Exact words zayn malik quoted after he left the band (larry is real and louis tops end of conversation) about the sweetest human(who once tripped over a dog and apologised to it) and killed 33% of the fandom

Directioner 1:we've come so far
Directioner 2 (young) :how far..?
Directioner 1: right from " i know the real you"

To
" i never really spoke to him"

by Louis tops May 16, 2019

Flag