somebody that drinks wine from a bag in excess, usually cheap wine purchased with social security monies.
by Tomthecoffeeboy May 22, 2025
Get the goon jockey mug.The sacred art of flicking one's penis or clitoris between strokes or rubs, altering between flicks and rubs. This achieves a rhythm so divine that it promises a state of unparalleled pleasure. The term draws inspiration from the biblical promise of the land of Canaan to Abraham—a covenant of fulfillment and maximum goon pleasure and volume.
In this context, however, the "land of milk and honey" is less about geography and more about the boundless euphoria found in perfectly synchronized flicks and strokes. Legend holds that even G-d sits in the celestial cuck chair, edging while marveling at the ingenuity of its own creation's ability to out-goon the holiest of holy.
Practitioners believe this technique ensures maximum engagement with the pleasure centers, occupying the body and mind as fully as an ancient prophecy fulfilled.
Truly, it is a modern pilgrimage for the devoted in gooning.
In this context, however, the "land of milk and honey" is less about geography and more about the boundless euphoria found in perfectly synchronized flicks and strokes. Legend holds that even G-d sits in the celestial cuck chair, edging while marveling at the ingenuity of its own creation's ability to out-goon the holiest of holy.
Practitioners believe this technique ensures maximum engagement with the pleasure centers, occupying the body and mind as fully as an ancient prophecy fulfilled.
Truly, it is a modern pilgrimage for the devoted in gooning.
USAGE 1:
Brian: Yo, where’s Dave? We’re trying to run this trio in valo rn, and he’s not responding!
James: Oh, it’s Shabbat. You know how he gets. He’s probably deep into his daily Canaanite Flicker Gooning. Something about “honoring the ancestors” while also achieving “maximum occupation of pleasure.” He’ll be back after he’s, uh, spiritually fulfilled?
USAGE 2:
Sammi: Where the hell is Sarah? We’re all waiting for her to pick a movie, and she’s MIA.
Jessica: Bruh, it’s Friday night. You already know she’s deep in her Canaanite Flicker Gooning session—probably ass-naked on her bed, double-flicking like she’s summoning ancient spirits. She says it’s about “embracing divine pleasure” or some shit, but let’s call it what it is: she’s just trying to goon herself into the promised land of milk, honey, and whatever else she can squirt out.
Sammi: Honestly, fair. If I could flick my bean into a transcendent coma, y’all wouldn’t see me on movie nights either.
Brian: Yo, where’s Dave? We’re trying to run this trio in valo rn, and he’s not responding!
James: Oh, it’s Shabbat. You know how he gets. He’s probably deep into his daily Canaanite Flicker Gooning. Something about “honoring the ancestors” while also achieving “maximum occupation of pleasure.” He’ll be back after he’s, uh, spiritually fulfilled?
USAGE 2:
Sammi: Where the hell is Sarah? We’re all waiting for her to pick a movie, and she’s MIA.
Jessica: Bruh, it’s Friday night. You already know she’s deep in her Canaanite Flicker Gooning session—probably ass-naked on her bed, double-flicking like she’s summoning ancient spirits. She says it’s about “embracing divine pleasure” or some shit, but let’s call it what it is: she’s just trying to goon herself into the promised land of milk, honey, and whatever else she can squirt out.
Sammi: Honestly, fair. If I could flick my bean into a transcendent coma, y’all wouldn’t see me on movie nights either.
by 000Six_Six000 December 10, 2024
Get the Canaanite Flicker Gooning mug.a person most of the times a nigga (cuz yanno roaches are multiplying by the second) who get no gets no type gyals or pussy
D'Ondre is a goon.
by gun-handler86 January 19, 2018
Get the goon mug.Croatian flicker gooning is a sexual act consisting of using a cheap vibrating buttplug which will periodically zap your prostate due to its poor quality and its controlled by Nikola Tesla's spirit who is summoned via an ouija board in a forest near Smiljan (the place Nikola Tesla was born in) while you goon while chanting the words "Nikola, bless me, and I shall bless your birthplace with my seed".
"Dude, I heard you are visiting Smiljan in a month. Is that true?" "Yeah, im going there mostly to try Croatian flicker gooning!"
by YVLdoja December 4, 2024
Get the Croatian flicker gooning mug.by Peter Pener March 13, 2025
Get the Flash Gooning mug.yo you see what happened to goon squad?
nah what happened?
we wiped there shit then gave it back, then took it again.
nah what happened?
we wiped there shit then gave it back, then took it again.
by white_supremacy445 April 2, 2022
Get the goon squad mug.