Being one from the Tri-State area, I can confirm that a Guido is a piss poor excuse for an Italian-American selling out his culture, country, and way of life. \
Commonly seen in trendy clubs/dive bars looking like half-a-fag with slicked up hair, shirts two sizes too small, popped-collars, ripped/tight jeans, and whatever else is trendy at the time, they are often dancing in the middle of the floor like a jackass while all the regular people point and laugh.
In said habitats, they are often seen drinking bitch drinks with cute umbrellas that are various colors of the rainbow, undoubtedly symbolizing their homosexuality.
Also can be described as a douchebag, among other various insults, that has an inflated sense of self worth, compounded by the IQ of someone that is legally retarded, behaving like a complete jackass in public at all times no matter how fucking retarded he may appear.
A fake, peice of shit looking bronze tan is commonly seen on these poor excuses of a human being, which adds to their ridiculous image that makes my life a hell of a lot more bearable.
Always seen in a gym, these jacked up guys actually have the balls the size of peanuts. Unable to fight a fight on their own, the rely on the fact that they travel in packs in order to intimidate those around them. When seen on their own, flight usually takes precedence when faced with a physical altercation.
If you seen one of these creatures in the wild, take cover, take pictures, and laugh. The most pathetic thing about these kids is that they actually take themselves seriously.
Commonly seen in trendy clubs/dive bars looking like half-a-fag with slicked up hair, shirts two sizes too small, popped-collars, ripped/tight jeans, and whatever else is trendy at the time, they are often dancing in the middle of the floor like a jackass while all the regular people point and laugh.
In said habitats, they are often seen drinking bitch drinks with cute umbrellas that are various colors of the rainbow, undoubtedly symbolizing their homosexuality.
Also can be described as a douchebag, among other various insults, that has an inflated sense of self worth, compounded by the IQ of someone that is legally retarded, behaving like a complete jackass in public at all times no matter how fucking retarded he may appear.
A fake, peice of shit looking bronze tan is commonly seen on these poor excuses of a human being, which adds to their ridiculous image that makes my life a hell of a lot more bearable.
Always seen in a gym, these jacked up guys actually have the balls the size of peanuts. Unable to fight a fight on their own, the rely on the fact that they travel in packs in order to intimidate those around them. When seen on their own, flight usually takes precedence when faced with a physical altercation.
If you seen one of these creatures in the wild, take cover, take pictures, and laugh. The most pathetic thing about these kids is that they actually take themselves seriously.
by JasonMB September 20, 2006
Get the guido mug.Beware this special brand of Staten Island boy - he is unique in his lack of uniqueness. He wasn't "cool" enough to be accepted by the other Staten Island boys due to the fact that he's probably fat and has acne that like, stares you in the face when you encounter him. He overcompensates for everything he lacks in self confidence by guising himself in "panache" and nobility. Oft he feels he has no purpose so he goes for a civil service job, such as firefighter, EMT, or cop. It's his only means of attaining power, and he has the option to make it look like he actually cares about people when the truth is he only cares about his fat pimply self
He has sex with anything and everyone (see slut, roast beef curtains, and staten island girl)because he has a complex about not being able to be alone, ever, and being a horny bastard who craves gratification.
He has the Staten Island Accent that makes you want to scream and run in circles with an ultimate goal of sticking your head under the ground, or scream running towards his acne mounds with a pickaxe.
He has sex with anything and everyone (see slut, roast beef curtains, and staten island girl)because he has a complex about not being able to be alone, ever, and being a horny bastard who craves gratification.
He has the Staten Island Accent that makes you want to scream and run in circles with an ultimate goal of sticking your head under the ground, or scream running towards his acne mounds with a pickaxe.
Elizabeth: Wow, look at that Staten Island Wanna-be Guido! He makes me sick; he's going to die alone with some sort of STD.
Maria: Oh fuck yeah. He's getting the clap, I just know it.
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Kathy: That's my partner at work. Truth is I can't stand him.
Kim: Why?
Kathy: He's such a Staten Island Wanna-be Guido; he's ugly but he's got a superiority complex up his ass.
Kim: Ooh! Shh, his girlfriend is coming. Whoa, is that a face?
Kathy: Oh, you mean his fuck buddy? Yeah, well, that unfortunate thing right around where her nose should be is called a face. He doesn't care, he'll stick his dick in anything he can persuade.
Maria: Oh fuck yeah. He's getting the clap, I just know it.
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Kathy: That's my partner at work. Truth is I can't stand him.
Kim: Why?
Kathy: He's such a Staten Island Wanna-be Guido; he's ugly but he's got a superiority complex up his ass.
Kim: Ooh! Shh, his girlfriend is coming. Whoa, is that a face?
Kathy: Oh, you mean his fuck buddy? Yeah, well, that unfortunate thing right around where her nose should be is called a face. He doesn't care, he'll stick his dick in anything he can persuade.
by Joanna Bannana March 19, 2008
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by jeR- December 21, 2009
Get the guidopino mug.Basically, that guy at the gym who:
- Begins screaming wildly while lifting 130 lbs.
- Lugs a 1 gallon water jug around, but never seems to drink it.
- Hits on anything that moves
- Obsesses with weight lifting, and takes Muscle Milk, Powerbars, or any other body building suppliment.
- Screams slogans while lifting weights, like "Feel da powa!"
- Begins screaming wildly while lifting 130 lbs.
- Lugs a 1 gallon water jug around, but never seems to drink it.
- Hits on anything that moves
- Obsesses with weight lifting, and takes Muscle Milk, Powerbars, or any other body building suppliment.
- Screams slogans while lifting weights, like "Feel da powa!"
Andrew is such a fucking guido. He was ejected from the gym for wearing sunglasses inside, and yelling that his workout partner should push "like his mother pushed him out of the womb." (True guido experience)
by Dashhh October 4, 2010
Get the Guido mug.A guido and douchebag combination, a double negative by definition in that a Guido is by definition already a douchebag.
by Franco Mena December 29, 2009
Get the Guidouche mug.see guido
A town in habited by guidos. usually down by the Jersey Shore, but occasionally in parts of New York City and other surrounding urabn areas. Frequent sitings of young, Italian men dressed in tracksuits with tight white tees, gold chains, and muscle cars.
A town in habited by guidos. usually down by the Jersey Shore, but occasionally in parts of New York City and other surrounding urabn areas. Frequent sitings of young, Italian men dressed in tracksuits with tight white tees, gold chains, and muscle cars.
Kerri: Wanna come down to my beach house this summer?
Me: Sure! Which beach is it at?
Kerri: Oh, down in Lavalette.
Me: Oh, it's in guidoville!
Me: Sure! Which beach is it at?
Kerri: Oh, down in Lavalette.
Me: Oh, it's in guidoville!
by jersey girl April 24, 2005
Get the guidoville mug.spends a lot of time getting ready in front of the mirror (probably longer than a woman), has enormous amounts of gel in his hair, wears a tight t-shirt or wife-beater and somehow eventually ends up with his shirt off. Ed Hardy shirts are preferred but if you're a poor guido Affliction shirts will do the trick. Other essential fashion accessories include designer sunglasses, gaudy jewelry (earrings, necklaces) and torn, stonewashed/white jeans. Steroids are almost a must and you must work out while looking into a mirror at all times. Over-Tanning is essential and a preferred look is an oompa-loompa shade of orange.The guido is very much into his looks, has a large ego, very proud of his italian ancestry, and very much into techno/euro-trance/beats music. This form of music gives way to the guido fist-pump and other forms of gyration. Guidos can dance anywhere including - but not limited to- parking lots and beaches. When guidos go out to party they engage in binge drinking, lame come-ons to anyone of the opposite sex, the guido-fist pump/dance off and the eventual roid-rage fight at the end of the night.
by 305 guy December 22, 2009
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