ass wipe

An ass kissing, self-inflated, "me first" son-of-a-bitch.

Jim, the office manager, was a total "ass wipe". You could always count on him to do whatever it took to may you look bad and him look good.

by fraterg May 11, 2003

Douche-Wipe

When the word Douche just isn't enough to insult someone, one may attatch the suffix-word, wipe. This adds a more douche-esque and profound element to the insult itself. This may confuse the person you insult, but it would be a douchey thing to do to explain this whole thing to them afterwards

Guy: Shut up you fxckin' Douche-wipe!

Guy #2: what did you just call me?

by jerry the suicidal freak August 10, 2006

arse wipe

a.To wipe ones arse, ass, bottom, exterior.
b.Also as a term of insult

a. I have had a poo, I need a good arse wipe
b. Your a complete fucking arse wipe

by Gary Ledsham August 11, 2003

cunt wipe

The nasty residue left after wiping the vagina. Could be urine, discharge, menstral blood or semen.

Used to define someone you don't like very much.

He's a proper cunt wipe!

by Oliver Cuntwell May 25, 2006

residue wipe

The act of rewiping your ass - usually about 30 minutes after taking your initial shit. This act of rewiping has to occur to relieve your ass from the itching that is so freaking bad and you know that either some shit is still clinging to your ass or shit has mysteriously reappeared. Immediate relief is usually felt afterward

Me- I think I have to do a residue wipe.
Wife- What the he'll is that?
Me- Well , I took a major shit earlier and now my ass (It is usually self explanatory after that)

by nkul August 13, 2014

Penis Wipe

Wiping your penis against a brick wall as a form of self harm.

Damn. This days been shit. I could really penis wipe right now.

by JelleySuckOff December 28, 2016

Executive Wipe

A common problem of today’s long sleeve shirt wearing executive business type.

After taking a notable and relieving dump, the anus is wiped as normal. However, the long shirt sleeve comes in too close contact with the rectal area while wiping thus rendering a swipe of fecal remnant on the sleeve.

Looks like my boss spilled hot chocolate on his sleeve or he had another executive wipe.

Something stinks. I can’t pinpoint the smell. Sorry I had an executive wipe during our meeting break. It’s my sleeve you are smelling. I couldn’t get it to wash out.

by Eaton Holgoode January 17, 2018