Dick Joke Paranoia

Basically anyone who believes they're going to get caught with a dick joke at any given moment. Doubting every question and reason.

Person X: *asks anything*
Person Y: "Ok, kys kid. Where's the dick joke?"
Person X: "You literally have dick joke paranoia, smh."

by Vincent Alex January 16, 2023

mic paranoia

when you're taking a shit during a zoom call and you have your camera blocked off, but you're still worried about your mic being muted

Jon: Damn I really gotta take a dump but I'm in a zoom call
Brett: Why don't you just go bro? It's cameras off
Jon: I can't I got mic paranoia

The Itchy/crawly in the head feeling you get any time someone so much as mentions the word Lice.

My Daughter has lice, I don't have it but because of my Lice Paranoia my heads been itchy all day!

by Shay Porter December 5, 2013

When you think you’ve got COVID because you got told to self-isolate by the NHS Covid-19 App

“Karen how do you feel today?”
“I feel a bit naff actually, but I got pinged by the app yesterday so I think it’s just ping paranoia”

by JonE28 July 15, 2021

When you have a big booty and you think every inaudible whisper is someone talking about it

"I could've sworn they were talking about my ass. Maybe I just have gyat paranoia."

by lavajellybeans October 31, 2023

The belief by google that every login is potentially fake and deserves deep investigation

fuckin' google-paranoia is nagging me again

by artag May 12, 2018