To make an apology for something relatively insubstantial, even mostly irrelevant, while simultaneously refusing to acknowledge something more grievous.
Bonus points if the apology is insultingly insincere and the apologist demands privacy and respect.
Named after Matt Hancock, Secretary of State for Health and Social Care of the UK, who was filmed having an extramarital romantic liaison - kissing and groping - an aide he personally hired. Hancock refused to acknowledge the romantic and sexual element of this interaction and, instead, chose to apologise for "breaching social distancing guidelines." He then asked for privacy for this "personal matter", alluding to the alleged affair sighted, while completely refusing to acknowledge the affair.
Bonus points if the apology is insultingly insincere and the apologist demands privacy and respect.
Named after Matt Hancock, Secretary of State for Health and Social Care of the UK, who was filmed having an extramarital romantic liaison - kissing and groping - an aide he personally hired. Hancock refused to acknowledge the romantic and sexual element of this interaction and, instead, chose to apologise for "breaching social distancing guidelines." He then asked for privacy for this "personal matter", alluding to the alleged affair sighted, while completely refusing to acknowledge the affair.
Jane: "You cheated on me over 15 years, murdered my mother, and stole all of my money. Why did you do all of this, you wasteman?"
Matt: "To invoke the Hancock apology, I am sorry that I ate all of your green Gummy Bear sweets. It was very wrong of me and I apologise. I would now like you to respect my privacy on this personal matter."
Matt: "To invoke the Hancock apology, I am sorry that I ate all of your green Gummy Bear sweets. It was very wrong of me and I apologise. I would now like you to respect my privacy on this personal matter."
by BroJayDee June 26, 2021
Get the Hancock apology mug.After upsetting your hot headed fella (usually Latino) or saying/doing something to disrespect him. You apologise by offering your arse and taking it up the bum. All is then forgiven.
"Valeria upset me the other day, disrespected my wife while we were at it. Was about to lose my shit but she gave me a Colombian apology to calm me down. Wasn't mad at her anymore after that."
by Fookem August 10, 2021
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Bre accused ol Arty of sleepin around. Now she's on her knees giving him the longest southern apology of her life.
by ArtoriusReptarthe13th April 27, 2022
Get the southern apology mug.Dear Reptilian Commander Stharzak this is Karen born a girl switched with a boy at birth Philip Piquet Vargas May 12th of the year 1989 from the Aurora Universe #1, Milky Way Galaxy of planet Earth. I have not been evolved since 1 years old by foul play you may know about and have thus been DNA Tampered to just a 3D Human with hardly any powers or abilities that is easily manipulated by micro chips or mind control brain implants known as MK ULTRA MONARCH initially created by the Central Intelligence Agency of the United States, also my consciousness has become so damaged that other Extra Terrestrials think in me and not all my thoughts are my own. My disrespectful comments towards you on the internet possibly had something to do with that or it was free will and individuality and I am a ignorant idiot who is legally disabled with schizophrenia by the state of Illinois. I apologize and am sorry to you Reptilian Commander Stharzak for my disrespectful comments over the internet, please find it in your heart to semi or fully forgive me and please don’t let me go to jail for some supposed FBI agent on Facebook Messenger as well as please have you and all your forces regenerate resurrect my 3D Human form, brain tissue and consciousness back to fully functioning constantly and body guard me successfully with prize or gift bounties to do that to me please I beg of you
by The Gods & Goddesses September 19, 2023
Get the Stharzak Apology mug.Bruh really disrespected me and then gave a Cole apology, as if that would make things go away... little did he know, I don't let shit slide...
by Pmdefine21 April 12, 2024
Get the Cole apology mug.Bruh really disrespected me in front of my friends and made a cole apology like that would settle everything... Little did he know I don't let shit slide.
by Pmdefine21 April 12, 2024
Get the Cole apology mug.The Strickland apology: “I’ll apologize, I’ll even take back what I said. I’ll remove posts, I’ll kill you and ruin your life and mine way before we step into the cage” -Strickland
by Panderift June 6, 2024
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