Refers to the outburst of social media updates when you meet someone new of the opposite sex who is absolutely awesome and completely changes your life. Instead of blowing a load of cum; it's a bunch of statuses and tweets.
Gina: "Holy crap, did you see all of Lincoln's statuses and tweets last night?" Rachel: "Yeah I heard they are all about Danielle" Connor: "She was so awesome he had to social media jerk off!"
by MC Lightning May 5, 2013

The act of consuming your friends cum and then jerking off with your left arm while thinking of what just happened.
by SnickerinSnape March 10, 2019

When the Adonis Johnny Bravo chiseled from the finest marble by the hands of Michelangelo himself. Descends down a snatches up the bird you spent all night trying to pull and leaves you with your dick in your hand. Smelling of shame and defeat your only option is to now head home and jerk off to some old pictures of Betty White.
by Cuddlepuddle69 February 14, 2022

When a guy jerks off intensely making Turkey noises and then cums on his girlfriend's back and sticks feathers to it
by Kinkyp33nyborder July 8, 2015

The act in which a male (or transgender female) dresses like Eminem and forces his/her's for/guy to call them Slim shady.
by Marshall maners October 24, 2018

The Opposite to a jack-of-all-trades.
someone who sucks at everything.
Or someone you dislike severly
someone who sucks at everything.
Or someone you dislike severly
by The JC September 1, 2007

by StevenJohnson69420 August 19, 2023
