Skip to main content

History

A set of made up stories compiled together to help brainwash majority of people. The _official_ method of producing such set is _speculation_. (source: Wikipedia). People who are capable to analyze material facts using cause-and-effect reasoning are kept away from compiling and presenting such sets. They are either lured into "exact" sciences such as physics, math, etc or made outcasts by the school system.
Nevertheless, history as a discipline seems like important for keeping the society to look civilized. At least on the surface. At least, in theory.
Ex1:
- According to history, Lincoln is credited with 1865 emancipation as the event exclusive to the USA and Lincoln's genius. Do you know when Russia emancipated its slaves?
- 1861, but it's not related.

Ex2:

- In 2022, in South Carolina they still teach their own history where Linkoln is an antagonist

Ex3: - It's well-known that history repeats itself.
- Well, that just means we can create alternative reality by telling people how we think they should have acted in the past.

(by the way Juneteenth, the official holiday, is celebrated each year because slaves technically were emancipated in 1863)
by Nikita1998 June 29, 2022
mugGet the History mug.

History

Erased from history because we're not as equal as people would like us to be.
Hym "You're trying to erase me from history so I'm going to murder a kid and then kill myself. You're trying to control me so I'm going to murder a kid and kill myself to prove that you can't. I'm going to murder a kid and kill myself and you deserve it."
by Hym Iam July 28, 2024
mugGet the History mug.

Search history

The system that can get you arrested or grounded for looking up illegal stuff
1. “I hate how the search history got my career ruined by being arrested…”

2. “I can’t go anywhere cause I’m grounded due to my mom seeing my search history…”
by TheShidGames May 19, 2023
mugGet the Search history mug.

writing history

an alternative way of saying you are taking a shit, mostly used in office with female colleagues.
"Probably after this lunch i'll be writing history"
"Awesome dude, i just went and it was great, pride!"
by wallis92 July 17, 2017
mugGet the writing history mug.

Date History

The mental "list" of all of the people somebody has dated.
"Should I go out with Kaley or do you think she's a slut?"

I dunno bro, shes got a long date history.
by laxer6 November 29, 2011
mugGet the Date History mug.

history of carrot

the history of king William making carrot orange. in 1500 king William III grew a shit ton of carrots but they were FUCKING purple or some shit so they magically made them orange
I fucking hate purple carrots!

Me too lets make them orange.

fuck yeaaaaa! history of carrot
by laclaclac February 4, 2025
mugGet the history of carrot mug.

Canada's History

The act of filling up the Stanley cup with maple syrup and dipping moose antlers in it and sticking them in any human orifice.
Jim broke up with Jenny when he saw that she was performing Canada's History on his new leather sofa.
by HiStephenCMC February 5, 2010
mugGet the Canada's History mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email