Toothpaste promise

Noun. A representation made, usually in advertising, that sounds impressive, but is effectively meaningless.
Based on the claim that all toothpaste ads make, i.e. 70% more effective (than brushing without toothpaste).

They said I could save hundreds of dollars per year on my car insurance, but that was compared to someone who never shops around, and has had the same policy for 10 years. It's always cheaper to switch to any other insurance company after a couple of years, so it was a total toothpaste promise.

by Werdenschmidt February 7, 2021

ohio toothpaste

Tartar Sauce

We stopped at a Big Boy and my sandwich was completely covered in Ohio Toothpaste

by Lil Teeth August 31, 2021

closing the toothpaste

1. Slang for putting a condom on.
2. Somebody who doesn't go all the way on something.

1.
Guy 1: Man, Alicia said she won't have sex with me unless I start closing the toothpaste.
Guy 2: Oh that sucks man.
Guy 1: Yeah I guess I better go buy some condoms.

2.

Person 1: Should we hire Tommy?
Person 2: No. He's a really good guy but he just doesn't close the toothpaste.
Person 1: What do you mean?
Person 2: Well for example on this last business deal he set 10 goals for himself but he only completed 6.
Person 1: Oh okay.

by aeather January 26, 2014

Toothpaste Remedy

The best thing to put on a bee sting

He used the Toothpaste remedy.

by funkypigeon100 February 28, 2017

cheese toothpaste

Cheese wiz that you use as toothpaste for cheesy teeth.

Dentist-"What do you use for toothpaste?"

Me-"Cheese toothpaste duh!"

by Summer with tree my door May 15, 2021

Burger Toothpaste

Noun
A kind of toothpaste that effectively ruins your teeth; an advertisement parody

CHILD 1- "Have you heard the latest advertisement?"
CHILD 2 - "No, what's it about?"
CHILD 1 - "Burger toothpaste,"
CHILD 2 - "Burger what? What's that?"
CHILD 1 - "It goes like this ... Burrrrr-ger toothpaste, no cavities, no teeth, Ole!"
CHILD 2 - "A very useful type of toothpaste that is!"

(Note the no cavities no teeth part)

by Coralkid November 10, 2017

bushman's toothpaste

Semen, cum, male ejaculate, etc. Derived from the days when toothpaste was not as freely available and a 'bushman' (Australian outback adventurer) had to rely on his own supply.

Example 1: I've been stuck in the bush for the last 3 weeks and had to rely on the ol' bushman's toothpaste to get by.
Example 2: She was gobblin my knob and I gave her a squirt of the ol' bushman's toothpaste.

by Rammer Dan May 17, 2004