I love the man, but I'm not going to go on with that, but rather prove a point to all the "Bruce Lee is better than Chuck Norris" bitches out there... Whose still alive? and how do you think Brandon Lee died?
As for Jackie Chan, He was in the movie The Tuxedo, instantly stripping him of his testicles.
Steven Segal is mounted above Chuck Norris' fireplace in his oklahoma home. Before he was locked in a cage and randomly and submissively beaten by chuck.
Jean Claude Van Damme died in a freak "had an appendage hastily removed after doing the splits on a chair and one of the chairs being roundhouse kicked out from underneath him" accident.
Chuck Norris once invited all of the other badasses from TV to duke it out in order to see who was the supreme badass. Only two showed up-- Jack Bauer and MacGyver.
Luckily for Mr. T., him and Chuck Norris have remained good friends throughout the years.
that covers any and every possible martial aritst/ t.v. badass ever.
MacGyver immediately tried to make a bomb out of some Q-Tips and Gatorade, but Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the solar plexus. MacGyver promptly threw up his own heart.
Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.
As for Jackie Chan, He was in the movie The Tuxedo, instantly stripping him of his testicles.
Steven Segal is mounted above Chuck Norris' fireplace in his oklahoma home. Before he was locked in a cage and randomly and submissively beaten by chuck.
Jean Claude Van Damme died in a freak "had an appendage hastily removed after doing the splits on a chair and one of the chairs being roundhouse kicked out from underneath him" accident.
Chuck Norris once invited all of the other badasses from TV to duke it out in order to see who was the supreme badass. Only two showed up-- Jack Bauer and MacGyver.
Luckily for Mr. T., him and Chuck Norris have remained good friends throughout the years.
that covers any and every possible martial aritst/ t.v. badass ever.
MacGyver immediately tried to make a bomb out of some Q-Tips and Gatorade, but Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the solar plexus. MacGyver promptly threw up his own heart.
Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.
by Ranger Rimjob August 08, 2006
by Dr. Snuggles July 11, 2003
Chuck Norris
by allthe420 March 18, 2018
by Jeebus Almighty February 13, 2008
by Yo September 09, 2004
Chuck Norris is the biggest badass on the planet. As a matter of fact, if you divide Chuck by zero, you get one... one badass that is! Some more proven facts about this badass are...
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can get Blackjack with just one card.
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris beat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
If you spell 'Chuck Norris' in scrabble, you win. Forever.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can get Blackjack with just one card.
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris beat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
If you spell 'Chuck Norris' in scrabble, you win. Forever.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
by gO:David August 23, 2009
Before the universe was created Chuck Norris was already born. He befriended Space and Time. One day when they were playing, Chuck Norris accidentally roundhouse kicked Space and Time, thus resulting in what we now know as the Big Bang.
Chuck Norris told me not to make any examples of him or if I did he would roundhouse kick me in the face so hard it would destroy the universe he created.
by Chuck Norris' Bitch July 20, 2009