by coolyourtools September 8, 2016
Get the cool your toolsmug. A tool is someone you hit with your penis in the face with while asleep... You take pictures and post them on line and tell everyone he's a "moe.. moe".... A tool is a guy who everyone doesn't want around because they know he wears diapers, but let him chill because u need a ride to the diaper factory.... A tool is someone who got caught having anal with a dog, he explains it by saying dog reverses to god? What makes him a tool and not a zooerastiaist is he is on the receiving end of the "god" (backwards) sex.... And lastly the top tool is a guy who follows stray dogs and catches the poo from their butts before hitting the ground... What he does with poo is pure toolism! Either covers his genitalia in it, or uses a pastry bag to inject it into his anus, also known as poo insert.
What is that guy doing, leave that dog alone you fucking tool... And put on some clothes, diapers on a millennial is just wrong!
by King-of-the-whifes February 1, 2025
Get the Toolmug. >Tends to "one up" another by regurtitating the same story you told but extends the content.
>Claims on many cliques, ie "I am a hardcore grunge hippie".
>Never contradicts what you say. Instead they constantly turn your argument into a personal story in order to please you.
>Perfers quanity over quality.
>Usefull not by there abilities, but by there benifits.
>Kills inside jokes, by quoting and/or referencing them terribly.
>Is a compulsive liar.
>When dating someone they embrace the fact to an annoying extent.
>Claims they lost there virginity an a young age to an older person.
>Has a collection of enemies
>Number one goal is to be noticed by as many people as possible
>Thinks Dane Cook is a funny comedian.
>Stupid hair cuts are usually a part of this
>Have some kind of weird ass physical abnormality (IE fucked up teeth, giant arms, etc)
>Have an annoying catch phrase
>Suck at telling jokes
>Think that, even if they are one in like 6 billion, they are the only one to have achieved certain trivial things
>There goal in life is to please as many people as possible
>Rejects of socialites.
>Think being a "Depressed bipolar drug addict" is cool
>Mosh at shows ( nothing is more fun than commiting self injury to a band called "As I lay dying" as well hitting the peacefull people who want to enjoy the music)
>The greatest movies, jokes, music and ideas have been killed by them.
>You cant build a house without tools.
>Claims on many cliques, ie "I am a hardcore grunge hippie".
>Never contradicts what you say. Instead they constantly turn your argument into a personal story in order to please you.
>Perfers quanity over quality.
>Usefull not by there abilities, but by there benifits.
>Kills inside jokes, by quoting and/or referencing them terribly.
>Is a compulsive liar.
>When dating someone they embrace the fact to an annoying extent.
>Claims they lost there virginity an a young age to an older person.
>Has a collection of enemies
>Number one goal is to be noticed by as many people as possible
>Thinks Dane Cook is a funny comedian.
>Stupid hair cuts are usually a part of this
>Have some kind of weird ass physical abnormality (IE fucked up teeth, giant arms, etc)
>Have an annoying catch phrase
>Suck at telling jokes
>Think that, even if they are one in like 6 billion, they are the only one to have achieved certain trivial things
>There goal in life is to please as many people as possible
>Rejects of socialites.
>Think being a "Depressed bipolar drug addict" is cool
>Mosh at shows ( nothing is more fun than commiting self injury to a band called "As I lay dying" as well hitting the peacefull people who want to enjoy the music)
>The greatest movies, jokes, music and ideas have been killed by them.
>You cant build a house without tools.
Human: I just bought an 8th of some decent weed for 55 dollars!
Tool: Dude! One time me and my friend found an 8th of PURPLE HAZE in my ex girlfriend's garage! It was free so we smoked it all! I was so high that me and her convinced her friend to do a threesome...I tapped it too!
**Swoops poorly colored bangs over forehead***
Human: That's cool...
**looks uninterested**
Tool: Yeah... I lost the tape tho man!
Tool: Dude! One time me and my friend found an 8th of PURPLE HAZE in my ex girlfriend's garage! It was free so we smoked it all! I was so high that me and her convinced her friend to do a threesome...I tapped it too!
**Swoops poorly colored bangs over forehead***
Human: That's cool...
**looks uninterested**
Tool: Yeah... I lost the tape tho man!
by slamjunk February 17, 2010
Get the Toolmug. by @PaparazziAreRight May 16, 2023
Get the Tool Kissmug. These hands, they're the devil's tools!
by emjayare August 5, 2021
Get the Devil's Toolsmug. used-up and desperate aging girls and the trolls they get to worship them that no other girls will talk to.
aging ex-strippers that can't get over the fact that they cannot manipulate men other than the fat weak pathetic losers that used to be their customers...
and the ugly loser dorks they end up getting to be their bitch boys they get to hack and harass the ex-boyfriends that dumped them. These tools know they won't get any pussy, they're just so starved for female contact they believe and do anything she says. Both are tools.
and the ugly loser dorks they end up getting to be their bitch boys they get to hack and harass the ex-boyfriends that dumped them. These tools know they won't get any pussy, they're just so starved for female contact they believe and do anything she says. Both are tools.
by herpes-neg May 24, 2007
Get the toolmug. by Arminkshipper August 9, 2024
Get the toolmug.