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Turtle smoke

The act of beating someone who is so slow even though you are incredibly slow yourself. Or is a procrastinator accomplishes a task before another procrastinator.
JPow was the worst procrastinator in the history of the world, but, he still managed to turtle smoke Lei-hi by completing his task of shucking his pile of corn stalks before her. ...thus, Leigha has been turtle smoked...
by LalaGG June 23, 2016
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turtle sticking it's head out

The feeling you have when it's time to take a shit and the turd is starting to poke out. Most annoying when you are far away from a bathroom.
"I've got to find a bathroom fast...I got a turtle sticking it's head out!!!
by Uncle Lee May 22, 2016
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Turtle Shell

When your balls shrivel up into your abdomen, leaving the scrotum looking like a ridge-textured turtle shell. This is commonly caused by either exposure to cold or in those situations that give you the willies, much like goosebumps.
I stepped into the pool, as soon as my balls touched the water, immediate turtle shell.
by Doo! May 21, 2016
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Tattle-worthy

A wrongdoing that deserves attention and should be reported
Singing at the table is not a tattle-worthy offense.

Standing on the kitchen table and using knives as microphones is a tattle-worthy offense.
by DandelionWine May 13, 2016
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Turtlenick

Girl: Whip it out Nick!
Guy: Heck ya! Ima bout to get some!
Girl: Eeew you have a smelly turtlenick living in your pants.
by Egg Slut Out in Public May 27, 2017
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Turtle True

Something awkward or unfortunately true, normally referring to something dirty.
Mary: I just had to pick up my medication.
John: Oh, for your herpes?
Mary: Yeah; turtle true.
by Medino July 11, 2017
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Turtle Tracks

Those unquestionable signs that a turtle has been taking a peek out the back door. Skid marks on one's undergarments as the result of turtleheading.
I pulled off me trousers and to my dismay, I found another set of turtle tracks. I can't wait until they finish renovating the third floor bathroom!
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