by DONTBELIKETRUMP September 21, 2016
Get the slave auctions mug.A volcanic town on an Island in the South Pacific populated by tourists, immigrants and foreign students.
Sometimes you will see moari, locals, or "pakeha" as they are known. The chief concern of the Aucklander is "getting back to nature" while doing their best to not to get anywhere near it. This involves airconditioning units, expensive sandles, personal locator beacons and shorts that are possibly a little too long and a little too short. The grandest fashion statement an Aucklander can make is to wear his shirt out.
The scenery is very nice, in an 1963 type way, and since the air is unpolluted, all colours are still as they appear in real life. A town to visit if you like to wait, enjoy electricity blackouts, or if you just want to know what it was like before you were born. One of the last places on earth where the sun doesn't scare people. Be careful of the sense of humour - all jokes must be first cleared with the Minister for Hilarity. Often it takes up to 6 six weeks for the punchline to be approved.
Sometimes you will see moari, locals, or "pakeha" as they are known. The chief concern of the Aucklander is "getting back to nature" while doing their best to not to get anywhere near it. This involves airconditioning units, expensive sandles, personal locator beacons and shorts that are possibly a little too long and a little too short. The grandest fashion statement an Aucklander can make is to wear his shirt out.
The scenery is very nice, in an 1963 type way, and since the air is unpolluted, all colours are still as they appear in real life. A town to visit if you like to wait, enjoy electricity blackouts, or if you just want to know what it was like before you were born. One of the last places on earth where the sun doesn't scare people. Be careful of the sense of humour - all jokes must be first cleared with the Minister for Hilarity. Often it takes up to 6 six weeks for the punchline to be approved.
Tourist 1: Is this the Bus to Whakawhangawhanga?
16 year old tourist guide: Ummm let me check...
Tourist 2: She's been gone an hour.
Tourist 1: Let's ask a passerby.
Southerner: Where have you come from?
Tourist: We flew into Auckland
Southerner: You mean DORKland.
Foreign Student: Yay! Auckrand!
Tourist: Huh?
16 year old tourist guide: Ummm let me check...
Tourist 2: She's been gone an hour.
Tourist 1: Let's ask a passerby.
Southerner: Where have you come from?
Tourist: We flew into Auckland
Southerner: You mean DORKland.
Foreign Student: Yay! Auckrand!
Tourist: Huh?
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