Pre-new year ejaculate

When people start saying "see you next year" the last week of December right up until the 31st at 11:59.

On Dec. 26th, Sam said to Dave, See you next year.
Dave replied to Sam, "Did you just Pre-new year ejaculate me?"

by Filamena C January 7, 2010

Pre-Emptive Deep-Sea Diving

Pre-Emptive Deep-Sea Diving is when, after taking an enormous shit, you pre-emptively stick your hand down in the toilet water and break up the gigantic turd BEFORE you flush, therefore avoiding an embarrasing overflow situation. Suffice to say, some prepartion is necessary. (If the situation around Uranus requires you to wipe immediately, just "stage" the used toilet paper (TP) on the edge of the bowl and flush them AFTER the crisis has resolved itself. Otherwise, wipe later. 1) Wad up a bunch of TP ahead of time, to be used to clean off your shit-stained finger tips after you've done the deed. 2) Pull your pants half-way up, just in case there is a flood. 3) DIVE!, DIVE!, DIVE! Stick that hand right down in there and start breaking that turd up. Don't be afraid to overdo it. 4) DON'T WIPE YOUR FINGERS OFF YET! Use your clean hand to flush, then quickly cross your fingers for good luck. 5) If all goes well, you've successfully dropped the Cosby Kids off at the pool. Congratulations! If it didn't work, skip Step 6 and proceed immediately to Step 7. 6) Use your pre-saved wad of TP to clean your fingers off, then drop the used TP in the bowl. Proceed to wipe your butt (or if you've pre-wiped, tap in the used TP) and drop the TP in the (now) nearly empty bowl. Whew! 7) If the poop break up did not work (or you were too pussy to do it!), quickly hobble out of the stall to the next stall and finish your paperwork there. Act innocent.

Ollie: Well, Stan, that was a delightful and quite filling meal. Now, if you'll just excuse me for a moment.

Stan: Don't forget about Pre-Emptive Deep-Sea Diving! (smiles sheepishly and scratches top of head).

Ollie: Indeed.

by The Sage Advice Man August 12, 2012

pre-est modernism

When God was thinking about creating Himself; as far from postest modernism as 3 superlative terms.

Pre-est modernism is the only concept as equally offensive to both Christians as it is to atheists.

by PoonForce2 February 18, 2010

pre-er modernism

When a monkey looked at the world, and realized that some things are things, and some things are not things.

The emergence of pre-er modernism was so radical that it caused a poop-flinging war that has raged through the ages and now goes by the name "philosophy".

by PoonForce2 February 18, 2010

pre-barf

The dry heaves that occur immediately before someone is about to barf.

When I woke up pre-barfing, I immediately headed for the bathroom.

by CocaColaer January 8, 2010

Pre-Swail

Canadian in origin;

Getting together to drink at someone's house, before going out.

Let's go over to Jim's house and Pre-Swail before we hit the Club.

by Hoser Lingo January 9, 2010

Pre-Unemployment

See Pre-Unemployed

Pre-Unemployment is the worst part of graduating without a job offer.

by CmeDiG April 30, 2011