table jail

The extended period during a wedding (or similar event) when guests are stuck seated at their assigned tables for way too long—usually due to drawn-out speeches, slow dinner service, slideshows, or excessive formalities. Typically includes boredom, mild social anxiety, and several unnecessary drinks.

“We didn’t even get up until 9:30. Total table jail.”
“The speeches were sweet, but I was in table jail with a lukewarm chicken breast and a stranger named Noah.”

by tmarienem May 19, 2025

Peanut Free Table

The lunch table designated for people who are deathly allergic to peanuts to eat at. Usually accompanied by an unoriginal No Peanuts or Tree Nuts sign. Many members of the table are part of a cult organization called Deez Nuts inc. which aims to assassinate the board of directors of the Planters Nut & Chocolate Company. Sometimes used by normal people to help gather their energy to fight through No Nut November.

Cole: Jimmy why are you sitting at the Peanut Free Table?

Jimmy: I am gathering my inner chi to finish the last 7 days of No Nut November.

Cole: Damn I already failed that day 1.

by Track and Shield November 10, 2021

Reopen table

Is making an online table reservation at a restaurant that is about to reopen post the Coronavirus outbreak.

We made a" Reopen table" reservation for 4 at the best Steakhouse on The "Charm'tastic Mile".

by Dunkadelic Era April 28, 2020

ate the whole table

what stupid roblox children say when they think someone did well at their game

"Omg stacy did so well in the beauty pageant, she legit ate the whole table"

by Medoh July 26, 2022

Minecraft Crafting Table

Minecraft block with absolutely no correct crafting recipes

I made a literal GOLDEN PICKAXE with my Minecraft Crafting Table WITH 3 PIECES OF PURE GOLD

by Lochhunter64BitGOD September 3, 2021

table

a animal that has leg

oh u fool ur a table

by Aidan fisk November 20, 2021

Riding the Table Saw

The most glorious act in all of middle school shop class. The weakest one is tied to the table saw by the strongest one, the smartest one turns on the saw, and the coolest one cranks the handle, spilling the blood in a way that makes my membranes quiver. The shop teacher finds this and begins to stab the children with a tool so diabolical, it must not be spoken of by name, lest the machinist in the basement hear the screams, and begin to mill the prototype.

Riding the table saw is the greatest achievement of the era, and is in practice throughout the galaxy.

by ellsworthtoohey January 20, 2018