by Matthew Boob June 15, 2022
by wobblebeard November 21, 2019
The act of beating someone who is so slow even though you are incredibly slow yourself. Or is a procrastinator accomplishes a task before another procrastinator.
JPow was the worst procrastinator in the history of the world, but, he still managed to turtle smoke Lei-hi by completing his task of shucking his pile of corn stalks before her. ...thus, Leigha has been turtle smoked...
by LalaGG April 05, 2016
When one has very large testicles and or penis, they will have a large bulge in their trousers that can be easily noticed.
by BoatMan May 26, 2015
Girl-come on Johnny, how do I get you turned on?
Johnny-I don't know
Girl-well I'm gonna go feed my turtle
Johnny-IT'S HAPPENING!!!! *fap fap fap fap* turtles.........it's the turtles!!!!!! They're so wrinkly and slow!!! It gets me hot!!!! OMG! I think I'm a turtle-loafer!!!
Girl-I'm glad to her that! Because I have a thing for slow wrinkly things too!
Johnny-I don't know
Girl-well I'm gonna go feed my turtle
Johnny-IT'S HAPPENING!!!! *fap fap fap fap* turtles.........it's the turtles!!!!!! They're so wrinkly and slow!!! It gets me hot!!!! OMG! I think I'm a turtle-loafer!!!
Girl-I'm glad to her that! Because I have a thing for slow wrinkly things too!
by Z4zebra July 24, 2012
“Hey Veronica, I just wanted to tell you that I think I love you. You’re the smartest, kindest, most beautiful person I’ve ever met, and I know we’ve only been on a few dates, but I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
“Yo that’s total Turtle Shit bro! I fucking love you.”
“Yo that’s total Turtle Shit bro! I fucking love you.”
by finnsatch February 17, 2023
When two consenting adults share in the loving act of pressing their assholes together, while simultaneously shitting. Usually a competitive endeavor, with the winner being the one to be covered in the least amount of the others shit.
by Turtle Wedding June 15, 2022