Jesus FC

A term used by football enthusiasts in lieu of "Jesus Fucking Christ" whenever someone misses a really easy shot. Originally used to refer to Gabriel Jesus, but now can be used to refer to any player

Jesus FC, how does Balotelli miss that?

by j0k#r October 29, 2019

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Jesus sandals

Sandals in which are usually leather and have two straps in front and back.

Look at her, she's wearing Jesus sandals.

by Annie anymous September 10, 2016

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noun, at least I think so. could be a noun, could be an adjective, who gives a shit. parts of speech are lame anyway.

"Jesus Powers" is the description one applies to a particular person when a particular situation has occurred that defies logic and reason. When the impossible has not only been made possible, but accomplished as well then an individual may be referred to as having Jesus Powers.

(During a late night online first-person shooter match)

Guy 1:"Dude! I shot this asshole with, like, 30 fuckin' bullets! No fuckin' way he could have survived that shit. I was lighting his ass up!"

Guy 2: "Dude's got fuckin' Jesus powers man."

(While attending a magic show)

"How does Criss Angel do that shit? Must have Jesus powers."

Guy 1: "Fuckin' Jesus powers."

by COD blows BFBC2 ROCKS September 11, 2011

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Jesus Cloud

When the sun is hidden behind a large cloud so that the light bounces all around the edges and creates an awesome shot of heavenly clouds. Unfortunately, cell phone cameras can never capture these epic views.

Bro: Whoa, look at that cloud, man!
Man: Dude that's epic.
Bro: Like, the light and stuff bouncing around.
Man: It's a Jesus Cloud!

by Ass Kicka January 30, 2012

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