turtle-loafer

1)Someone who get sexual pleasure from imagining a turtle.

Girl-come on Johnny, how do I get you turned on?
Johnny-I don't know
Girl-well I'm gonna go feed my turtle
Johnny-IT'S HAPPENING!!!! *fap fap fap fap* turtles.........it's the turtles!!!!!! They're so wrinkly and slow!!! It gets me hot!!!! OMG! I think I'm a turtle-loafer!!!
Girl-I'm glad to her that! Because I have a thing for slow wrinkly things too!

by Z4zebra July 23, 2012

spinning turtle

An act of sitting crossed legged on a rotating office chair. Spin around in continuous circles until you and your colleagues think you're lightheaded.
If a person frequently indulges in the spinning turtle act - he or she can be labelled as "The Spinning Turtle".

Royster, do the spinning turtle!

He just can get enough of doing the spinning turtle.
The Spinning Turtle is at it again.

by thehappysausage September 12, 2013

Turtle Day

n. - A day to yourself where you stay in your metaphorical "shell" and do only what you want to do.

Typically, a person will stay in bed with a laptop and/or pen and paper. Maybe under blankets (like the turtle's shell)

Today, I didn't want to go to class or work, so I took a Turtle Day as my roommate brought me food in bed and I doodled all day. It was well deserved and rephreshing

I heard you're stressed out, why not take a Turtle Day? It can help you wind out!

by Saile February 26, 2011

Turtle Shuffle

When you have a shit trying to poke out of your anus and you are trying to shuffle slowly to the crapper before it comes completely out.

Dude I had to crap so bad I was doing the turtle shuffle to the bathroom.

by Maple Backwoods September 14, 2011

Nasty Turtle

When you submerge yourself completely in the fluids of a porta potty just enough to where you can lay horizontal and be hidden under the waste. Then you wait for someone to sit down so you then you become erect and enter them discreetly.

I was at a festival last week and I was doing the nasty turtle.

by cooper mullin February 24, 2023

Turtle Shit

The fucking coolest shit ever. Like bro. Don’t even.

“Hey Veronica, I just wanted to tell you that I think I love you. You’re the smartest, kindest, most beautiful person I’ve ever met, and I know we’ve only been on a few dates, but I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
“Yo that’s total Turtle Shit bro! I fucking love you.”

by finnsatch February 16, 2023

Turtle press

A turtle press is when you scoop your poop out of the toilet and shove your feces in your anus as hard as you can. Ideally for missing out on any nutrients such as protein or vitamins. Much like a turtle going back into its shell. But your anus is the shell and your turds are the turtle

Dude did you hear Jimmy doing a turtle press last night?

by Pizzafart33 May 12, 2023