turtle-loafer

1)Someone who get sexual pleasure from imagining a turtle.

Girl-come on Johnny, how do I get you turned on?
Johnny-I don't know
Girl-well I'm gonna go feed my turtle
Johnny-IT'S HAPPENING!!!! *fap fap fap fap* turtles.........it's the turtles!!!!!! They're so wrinkly and slow!!! It gets me hot!!!! OMG! I think I'm a turtle-loafer!!!
Girl-I'm glad to her that! Because I have a thing for slow wrinkly things too!

by Z4zebra July 23, 2012

spinning turtle

An act of sitting crossed legged on a rotating office chair. Spin around in continuous circles until you and your colleagues think you're lightheaded.
If a person frequently indulges in the spinning turtle act - he or she can be labelled as "The Spinning Turtle".

Royster, do the spinning turtle!

He just can get enough of doing the spinning turtle.
The Spinning Turtle is at it again.

by thehappysausage September 12, 2013

Turtle Day

n. - A day to yourself where you stay in your metaphorical "shell" and do only what you want to do.

Typically, a person will stay in bed with a laptop and/or pen and paper. Maybe under blankets (like the turtle's shell)

Today, I didn't want to go to class or work, so I took a Turtle Day as my roommate brought me food in bed and I doodled all day. It was well deserved and rephreshing

I heard you're stressed out, why not take a Turtle Day? It can help you wind out!

by Saile February 26, 2011

Turtle Shuffle

When you have a shit trying to poke out of your anus and you are trying to shuffle slowly to the crapper before it comes completely out.

Dude I had to crap so bad I was doing the turtle shuffle to the bathroom.

by Maple Backwoods September 14, 2011

Turtle press

A turtle press is when you scoop your poop out of the toilet and shove your feces in your anus as hard as you can. Ideally for missing out on any nutrients such as protein or vitamins. Much like a turtle going back into its shell. But your anus is the shell and your turds are the turtle

Dude did you hear Jimmy doing a turtle press last night?

by Pizzafart33 May 12, 2023

Turtle press

A turtle press is when you grab a turd out of the toilet. It can be yours or a strangers, and shove it back into your anus in case you missed any nutrients such as protein or vitamins. Thus your anus being the turtle shell and the poop being the turtle

Dude did you hear Frank doing a turtle press last night?

by Pizzafart33 May 12, 2023

Turtle Sink

The act of a student who needs to shit so bad, and all the stalls are locked, so they shit in the sink, and cram it down the drain.

Student1: Hey your back early did you make it on time.
Turtle Sinker: Nah, I had to Turtle Sink it.

by Thelasthayoullsee July 20, 2023