A term sometimes used in certain software engineering circles to refer to the excessive use of things like object-oriented programming, specifically its principle of abstraction, to create highly abstract, polymorphic, incomprehensible and unnecessarily complex systems within software instead of keeping things simple.
This is usually practiced by "engineers" who value the "design" of software more than actually delivering value
to the software's users and/or believe that writing software is akin to designing a car or a building. Buildings, for example, cannot easily be torn down again if some part was constructed incorrectly or contains an error, whereas most software can.
While some may argue that it's prudent to keep one's code "clean" or "extendible" and whatnot, excessive abstraction can have the exact opposite effect: You get an unnecessarily complex mess that is extremely hard to untangle once you actually discover a use case which it didn't account for. The result is a "building" that cannot easily be rebuilt - said whiteboard masturbators will then argue, that "it should've just been designed better in the first place" and that the "model wasn't good enough" and will continue to draw UML diagrams that are of no use apart from impressing the sales department.
This is usually practiced by "engineers" who value the "design" of software more than actually delivering value
to the software's users and/or believe that writing software is akin to designing a car or a building. Buildings, for example, cannot easily be torn down again if some part was constructed incorrectly or contains an error, whereas most software can.
While some may argue that it's prudent to keep one's code "clean" or "extendible" and whatnot, excessive abstraction can have the exact opposite effect: You get an unnecessarily complex mess that is extremely hard to untangle once you actually discover a use case which it didn't account for. The result is a "building" that cannot easily be rebuilt - said whiteboard masturbators will then argue, that "it should've just been designed better in the first place" and that the "model wasn't good enough" and will continue to draw UML diagrams that are of no use apart from impressing the sales department.
"Maybe we should use a visitor pattern to separate this strategy from the concrete adapter that is instantiated by our abstract factory so we can guarantee arbitrary observability throughout our proxied chain of responsibility."
"... listen, at this point it's just whiteboard masturbation. Just keep it simple and write a function."
"... listen, at this point it's just whiteboard masturbation. Just keep it simple and write a function."
by Aequitosh February 28, 2024
Get the whiteboard masturbation mug.i.e. this is when one derives sexual pleasure contemplating an object or subject, and/or overthinking something outwith their expertise resulting in grandiosity from confirmation bias
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You probably are horny right now, so here goes nothing
*He dimmed his lights, his heart beating in anticipation. His pants felt too tight, and he sat down on his chair, opening his laptop. He clicked on porn hub, and luckily he was home alone so he played the dirty moans at full volume. He put his palm on his pants, feeling his hardening cock. He pressed against it, shuddering in pleasure. The video intensified, making him even more desperate, so he quickly unbuttons his pants and lets his dick breathe. It’s slick with precum, and he keeps his eyes glued to the hot video as his fist closes over his thick member. He lets out a shudder, then pumps his fist, slowly at first. He then starts going faster, thrusting his hips into his hand, jerking himself off. He feels his cock get heavy, ready to cum. And he stops. He knows it’ll all pay off when he has an even better orgasm after edging. He pants, his high going down. He slowly rubs the tip of his cock with his forefinger and thumb, whimpering. Then he enclosed it in his fist again, slowly getting faster and faster as his moans mingled in with the videos. He felt his cock fill up again and his balls tighten, and with one last thrust, he orgasmed. Hot streams of cum shot out from his cock, splattering on his stomach. He shot far, and kept rubbing his cock as he went down from his high.*
You probably are horny right now, so here goes nothing
*He dimmed his lights, his heart beating in anticipation. His pants felt too tight, and he sat down on his chair, opening his laptop. He clicked on porn hub, and luckily he was home alone so he played the dirty moans at full volume. He put his palm on his pants, feeling his hardening cock. He pressed against it, shuddering in pleasure. The video intensified, making him even more desperate, so he quickly unbuttons his pants and lets his dick breathe. It’s slick with precum, and he keeps his eyes glued to the hot video as his fist closes over his thick member. He lets out a shudder, then pumps his fist, slowly at first. He then starts going faster, thrusting his hips into his hand, jerking himself off. He feels his cock get heavy, ready to cum. And he stops. He knows it’ll all pay off when he has an even better orgasm after edging. He pants, his high going down. He slowly rubs the tip of his cock with his forefinger and thumb, whimpering. Then he enclosed it in his fist again, slowly getting faster and faster as his moans mingled in with the videos. He felt his cock fill up again and his balls tighten, and with one last thrust, he orgasmed. Hot streams of cum shot out from his cock, splattering on his stomach. He shot far, and kept rubbing his cock as he went down from his high.*
I was horny so I masturbated.
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Get the masturbed mug.An Urban Legend from colonial Southbend, Indiana about a Fisher man attending Fisher Town Hall meetings and parlor events to masturbate in public spaces. The townspeople banished him for ejaculating in the town’s lake. Legend has it, it you look too deeply into St. Joe’s river, the Fisher man stares back.
Frank: Do you that Greek story about that dude that fell in a lake or something?
Fred: Yeah, The Fisher Masturbator?
Fred: Yeah, The Fisher Masturbator?
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