go read a book

leave/go home/masturbate/shut up

origin: San Anselmo, CA, THE CHAMBER

i'll meat up with you guys kater i gotta read a book

god your being annoying just go read a book!

by Larry July 29, 2004

never cracks a book

an phrase meaning never or rarely reading

"He spends so much time on the computer that he will never cracks a book to pass the time."

by Sean dude May 29, 2008

couldn't-give-a-fuck book

A ficticious item that can be used in sarcastic replies to people who tell you something that you really couldn't give two shits about. Especially useful for people who work in customer-facing roles eg. bouncers, security guards etc.

Guy: I really need to get in that club!
Bouncer: You're not coming in.
Guy: But my friends are in there with my ID...
Bouncer: Ah ok, well let me just write that down in my couldn't-give-a-fuck book...

by samwisegamg33 May 13, 2011

slam book

A book, usually a notebook where you right something mean about people you don't like.

Ooh, she made me mad yesterday, I'm adding her in my slam book.

by Ya-Ya May 13, 2005

kid's book

the best strong bad email as of yet

"Everyone is different. No two people are not on fire. AWWWW"

by *tweak* October 8, 2003

The book of Mormon

A religious holy book that is reverenced by Mormons, who are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Written by Joseph Smith, who is alleged to have received an Angelic revelation revealing the location of golden plates of which tell the tale of Christ visiting the American natives shortly after being resurrected. Those who adhere to this religion are known to wear what is described by many as "Holy Underwear". Mormons are forbidden to be referenced by the first name, instead opting for the title of "Elder", or "Sister". As one with half a brain could probably deduce, it is a religion of pure bullshit. Obvious bullshit.

Elder Johnson: Oh, Tom...I think...I just shit my Holy Underwear! What am I going to do?

Elder Richards: Hey, shit for brains...I thought I told you to call me Elder. So you shit your holy drawers? Don't worry. It is Holy Shit now. Damn, that stinks!

Atheist: Hey, don't worry guy! Just tear a few pages out of The Book of Mormon, and use it to wipe your ass. It is basically what it is, an ass-wipe.

Elder Johnson: *scratches chin* You know...I think maybe you are right...

by SevereveS December 3, 2010

Hooker Book

1. To flee rapidly from an area while attempting to remain casual, upon discovery of involvement in nefarious activity by an authority figure.

2. List of names (or a person whose name appears on said list) of friends with benefits for whom the "friend" portion consists solely of "dates" in which the man pays for the woman's dinner or movie, followed by sex.

1. Every time the boss opens his office door all the dudes visiting his hot new secretary do the hooker book back to their cubicles...Embarrassing.

2. Yo, I saw you and Mary Jane at dinner the other night. Are you actually dating that ho? Naw man, she strictly hooker book.

by Bitter Pills January 27, 2010