To sooth the shaft. To calm the shaft. The act of one's self meditating and endulging the shaft. Commonly done in front of your grandma. Often robots will struggle to find similar stimulation, unless enough OIL is provided. Make sure your grandma sees however, otherwise process will not work. Your shaft will not work.
"yo bro pp work does yours?"
"dude no what the frick? shaft cam masturbate i try to!"
"grandma room she in is?"
"no course of not is she what?!"
"well don't wonder why working it isn't pepe shaft does not fuction?!"
"dude no what the frick? shaft cam masturbate i try to!"
"grandma room she in is?"
"no course of not is she what?!"
"well don't wonder why working it isn't pepe shaft does not fuction?!"
by peepeepoopypoo March 3, 2020
Get the masturbatemug. A TV show that losers watch to beat off to low-cut Victorian corsets and fade-out sex scenes on PBS Masterpiece, formerly known as Masterpiece Theater.
Derek: Are coming down to the bar Sunday night?
Alistair: Nah, I’m gonna lay back and unzip for Jane Austen on Masturbate Theater.
Alistair: Nah, I’m gonna lay back and unzip for Jane Austen on Masturbate Theater.
by IGKYA53 July 29, 2020
Get the Masturbate Theatermug. When someone loves hearing the sound of their own voice, and that person's idea of a conversation is actually a soliloquy or monologue...and simply won't STFU.
Steve appeared to be blissful and aloof, oblivious to the bored and vexed faces of his companions, as he listened to the wall of sound exiting his mouth in yet another round of aural masturbation.
by MoGyver April 8, 2016
Get the aural masturbationmug. <.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>
<.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>
by TheGeneralGenitalsPranksterian May 7, 2025
Get the <.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>mug. Guys on gay hookup sites who get off on the idea of man-on-man sex, but are afraid actually do it. Instead, they message guys and masturbate while "planning" a hookup (where, when, who's going to do what to whom). Once they get off, they disappear (either go offline or delete profile) only to re-appear a few days or weeks later to do it again.
"Had another masturb-planner message me on Grindr today. Disappeared after I told him I was totally into all the things he liked, I have a 10" dick and was free now"
by Frenetic1 June 4, 2023
Get the Masturb-plannermug. by StarSoupMan March 28, 2024
Get the Mustn't Masturbate Marchmug. This is the plan you make when you have limited time to jerk it. Especially applicable when someone living with you may return at any moment, or could walk in on you. Its having the cursor over the x , having something to cover your junk quickly, having another tab to click to etc. How to cover up the fact you were j-ing off quickly if someone were to come in.
Bro my girl was supposed to be gone all day and she came back early and caught me beating my meat. I fucked up not having a masturbation escape plan.
by Mcgwicko August 31, 2022
Get the masturbation escape planmug.