Matter and liquid that appears on the back side of the top of a toilet seat. The matter is usually underwear lint flecks while the liquid is often the afterbirth of diarreah.
I wiped away Larry Dales's ass crud with a paper towel and then took to the seat.
The ass crud was dry so I had to lick the toilet seat and THEN wipe it off.
The ass crud was dry so I had to lick the toilet seat and THEN wipe it off.
by Hcaz Sakraf February 14, 2008
Get the ass crudmug. When your butt gets flat, wide, and jiggly from sitting so much (i.e. studying for finals, at a desk) without going to the gym.
by Caligrl887 September 9, 2009
Get the Secretary's assmug. v. (Past Simple) The past action of Ass Canning. When an individual has been on the receiving end of anal sex.
Last night Johnny was ass canning Jill while watching the evening news. The next morning, Jill was speaking to her best friend Melissa about the previous night of anal sex. Jill told Melissa, "Johnny ass canned me good, and I can barely sit down today."
by St0rmshadow May 19, 2008
Get the Ass Cannedmug. ass blos·som as blos-uhm-n. a burgeoning rectal sphincter. The purtruding rosey inards of a chick that got ass fucked really hard. Sometimes a result of fisting or large object insertion.
...and then Mike fucked her ass right after Joey; she just laid there moaning with her ass blossom all stickin' out n' shit!
by JJM Productions July 18, 2007
Get the ass blossommug. by Howard_HUZE May 9, 2017
Get the Ass Bettingmug. The number of times your ass leaves or touches a seat for any given activity. Useful for evaluating the relative effort required between two activities, especially when one activity involves someone else doing the work.
If I eat the cold pizza in the fridge, that's an ass factor of 2 (ass leaves couch, get pizza, ass touches seat), whereas going to Burger King is an ass factor of 4 (ass leaves couch, touches car seat, leaves car seat and then touches couch).
If I get up and get a beer, that's an ass fact or of 2. If you get it for me, that's an ass factor of 0.
If I get up and get a beer, that's an ass fact or of 2. If you get it for me, that's an ass factor of 0.
by Pancreas100 March 7, 2009
Get the ass factormug. The order of french fries consisting of the remains of a once proud batch. This order has the short, burned, crisped-solid, or fingernail like french fries. Fast food workers often try to compensate for ass fries by sheer volume of fries. May lead to depression or recipient becoming punchy.
Ricky's cheerful attitude took a turn for the worse after seeing a box of ass fries next to his cheeseburger.
by Pac_Eddy May 1, 2009
Get the ass friesmug.