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Dumber than a Bucket of Dogshit 

Someone who is dumber than dogshit - their brain is the equivalent of a bucket...FULL of dogshit. While probably also morally inept/retarded, their intelligence is likely due to inbreeding somewhere in the family tree, or possibly being tossed into a ceiling fan as an infant. They usually turn into a screeching autist when triggered for an illogical reason.

Alternative phrase: "Uglier than a bucket of dogshit".
"All these politicians are dumber than a bucket of dogshit. I would rather have a bucket of literal-fucking-dogshit 'lead' me than these political assclowns."

"A bag of hammers, a box of rocks, and a bucket of dogshit -combined- have more intelligence than that fuckfaced douchefag."

I’ll be dipped in dogshit

What Ted Hanson says when he’s surprised
“Wait you ran into Paulie Wallnuts in downtown Gallatin?! I’ll be dipped in dogshit!”