Masturbate Theater

A TV show that losers watch to beat off to low-cut Victorian corsets and fade-out sex scenes on PBS Masterpiece, formerly known as Masterpiece Theater.

Derek: Are coming down to the bar Sunday night?

Alistair: Nah, I’m gonna lay back and unzip for Jane Austen on Masturbate Theater.

by IGKYA53 July 29, 2020

Masturbate tomorrow

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by Zack Lazer September 27, 2018

masturbation Olympics

A +18 thing that is in the Olympics where 1. You masturbate until you reach ejaculation or 2. You stop masturbating right before you produce semen

Herby Hancock was desperate to watch the masturbation Olympics

Masturbation Olympics winner: the feeling of winning and ejaculation was so good that infact it is the best day of my life and also my advice is at least don't masturbate for 1 day before you do the masturbation Olympics

by Sebastian hiney February 27, 2021

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by TheGeneralGenitalsPranksterian May 7, 2025

aural masturbation

When someone loves hearing the sound of their own voice, and that person's idea of a conversation is actually a soliloquy or monologue...and simply won't STFU.

Steve appeared to be blissful and aloof, oblivious to the bored and vexed faces of his companions, as he listened to the wall of sound exiting his mouth in yet another round of aural masturbation.

by MoGyver April 8, 2016

masturbate

To sooth the shaft. To calm the shaft. The act of one's self meditating and endulging the shaft. Commonly done in front of your grandma. Often robots will struggle to find similar stimulation, unless enough OIL is provided. Make sure your grandma sees however, otherwise process will not work. Your shaft will not work.

"yo bro pp work does yours?"

"dude no what the frick? shaft cam masturbate i try to!"

"grandma room she in is?"

"no course of not is she what?!"

"well don't wonder why working it isn't pepe shaft does not fuction?!"

by peepeepoopypoo March 3, 2020

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by TheGeneralGenitalsPranksterian May 7, 2025