A person who gets a watch or jewellery item on finance and tells their friends, coworkers and loved ones they bought it outright.
Bob: "Did you know Dave's new watch he flashed and boasted about? It's on bloody finance!"
Wallace: "Ha ha ha that goon's a finance wanker!"
Wallace: "Ha ha ha that goon's a finance wanker!"
by Some random guy down south December 10, 2017

a person who is often not generally liked among peers and often acts like they are extremely cool even though they are the complete opposite.
by mykill ranahin May 6, 2019

the people at the urban dictionary who tells me not to take it personally when they don't publish my flippin word. So, to you dickholes, frick u.
pardon my french, but u are a wanker
by doodie hole July 15, 2018

by Howard the psyduck June 6, 2015

Absolutely. Here's your official Urban Dictionary-style entry for wankering—a word born of chaos, cemented in canon, and now ready to confuse the masses:
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📚 wankering (verb)
/ˈwaŋ-kər-iŋ/
Definition:
The act of masturbating—typically in a self-indulgent, theatrical, or dramatically unnecessary fashion.
Often used mockingly or playfully to describe someone who is “having a moment” alone, usually with way too much enthusiasm or mood lighting.
Origin:
A delightful bastardization of “wanking” (UK slang for masturbation), likely coined by someone trying to sound posh or intellectual while still talking about jacking it. First widely noticed on American commentary shows attempting to discuss UK school scandals with zero chill.
Not to be confused with:
“Wanking” (standard British usage)
“Wanker” (a jerk)
“Tossing off” (also jerking it, but with a Shakespearean twang)
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Let me know if you'd like alternate definitions like:
Wankering (noun): A state of chaotic, overly dramatic horniness.
Wankering (adj.): Describing something absurdly masturbatory in tone or style (e.g., "That fanfic was so wankering it practically wrote itself.")
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📚 wankering (verb)
/ˈwaŋ-kər-iŋ/
Definition:
The act of masturbating—typically in a self-indulgent, theatrical, or dramatically unnecessary fashion.
Often used mockingly or playfully to describe someone who is “having a moment” alone, usually with way too much enthusiasm or mood lighting.
Origin:
A delightful bastardization of “wanking” (UK slang for masturbation), likely coined by someone trying to sound posh or intellectual while still talking about jacking it. First widely noticed on American commentary shows attempting to discuss UK school scandals with zero chill.
Not to be confused with:
“Wanking” (standard British usage)
“Wanker” (a jerk)
“Tossing off” (also jerking it, but with a Shakespearean twang)
---
Let me know if you'd like alternate definitions like:
Wankering (noun): A state of chaotic, overly dramatic horniness.
Wankering (adj.): Describing something absurdly masturbatory in tone or style (e.g., "That fanfic was so wankering it practically wrote itself.")
Oi, mate, don’t go wankering in the loo again during maths revision. The janitor’s still traumatized from last time.”
by Chloe 8675309 June 26, 2025

1. typically used as an insult
2. used when someone who usually wanks and knows that you know that they masturbate; Calling names
3. typically used by an Australian
2. used when someone who usually wanks and knows that you know that they masturbate; Calling names
3. typically used by an Australian
by Oh_nyet June 1, 2022

A tradition where, upon a young lad’s awkward yet triumphant first solo adventure, his parents—presumably both proud and horrified—present him with a ceremonial piece of shortbread to mark his transition into a deeply confusing stage of life.
In the north of England this shortbread is often accompanied by some of the fathers custard.
In the north of England this shortbread is often accompanied by some of the fathers custard.
by Poppyseed Monkey January 28, 2025
