goon wank

A bloody wanker of course! Who also has goon-like qualities. See goonler, goonition, and goondued.

Greg: Wow this wanker has got to be up to something odd... He always pwns life, gets the ladies, and gets all the gym rats wanting to touch his privates.

Henry: Sir, thats a goon wank for ya!

by Goondued November 7, 2011

wink WANK

the unofficial motto of the UK Furs Discord. Also used as a summoning word for a good friend.

John: wink WANK
Dan: yes, John? you summoned me?

by Electricsh4rk September 18, 2019

Wank Statement

The browsing history of someone who regularly visits web sites with the intent to plunder Percy the pink

After reviewing my wank statement I can see that I have made over 30 deposits this month.

I found your mum on line last week and if I just check my wank statement I can give you the web address.

by Ravey Davey Gravy March 6, 2018

Business wank

noun. A bout of masturbation conducted purely for practical reasons. It can be enjoyed, but that is not its purpose. It is done solely to necessarily relieve high stress, drain one's blue balls, or because the next opportunity to have one off the wrist could be far into the future.

"Yo, what took you so long?"

"Sorry, I've got dinner with my girlfriend's parents tonight, then we're all staying at this place with paper-thin walls and we can't bang later, so I had to have a quick business wank."

by burnard August 17, 2014

Wanking the tank

Another term for male masturbation.

Guy: “Yo why haven’t you been gaming recently? Are you grounded?”
Friend: “Yeah, my mom caught me wanking the tank on friday, she said no ps4 for a month.”
Guy: “Damn, that’s awkward.”

by Rectumstretcher89 October 30, 2019

Wank Worthy

When you draw experiences from real life that could be used to beat your meat. E.g. Some nice Chest Cheeks, or the homie's booty.

*Fit teacher walks in with some juicy Chest Cheeks
Student 1: Damn boy, those tits are wank worthy.

Student 2: They going in the spank bank for tonight!

by Certified_Swxsh May 24, 2022

The Brett wank

The brett wank is a form of masturbation in public mainly on the east coast of England.

Did you see that lad having the brett wank on the beach last night

by Bait needle January 7, 2021