by Mika_bos March 26, 2024
Get the Floor & Feline mug.
Feline Derangement Syndrome
A behavioural and psychological condition most commonly observed in certain rural/suburban men (frequently self-identified "rednecks" or "bogans) characterised by an obsessive, disproportionate hatred toward domestic cats, especially outdoor or stray ones.
Core symptoms include:
- Referring to all cats as " invasive murder machines" while simultaneously defending or participating in far more destructive activities and ignoring science.
- Posting photo of themselves shooting, trapping or harming cats while captioning them with phrases like "protecting muh songbirds" or "doing nature a favor". They usually have pit bulls they train to kill anything on sight.
- Having unusually strong emotional reactions to the mere sight of a cat sitting on a fence
- Insisting that cats are single-handedly causing ecological collapse while ignoring habitat loss, climate change, industrial agriculture, etc
- Frequently displaying classic small-penis-adjacent overcompensation behaviours (loud utes , giant lifted tires, guns)
- Unresolved and poorly sublimated mommy issues that appear to transfer onto any small, independent, vaguely feminine-coded animal that doesn't obey commands
- low IQ usually left school at Year 8
Typical associated phrases:
- "The only good cat if a dead cat”
- "I love all animals, except cats”
- "My wife left me and took the kids or I can’t find a girlfriend but at least I can still take my inadequacies and hate out on a 4lb cat”
A behavioural and psychological condition most commonly observed in certain rural/suburban men (frequently self-identified "rednecks" or "bogans) characterised by an obsessive, disproportionate hatred toward domestic cats, especially outdoor or stray ones.
Core symptoms include:
- Referring to all cats as " invasive murder machines" while simultaneously defending or participating in far more destructive activities and ignoring science.
- Posting photo of themselves shooting, trapping or harming cats while captioning them with phrases like "protecting muh songbirds" or "doing nature a favor". They usually have pit bulls they train to kill anything on sight.
- Having unusually strong emotional reactions to the mere sight of a cat sitting on a fence
- Insisting that cats are single-handedly causing ecological collapse while ignoring habitat loss, climate change, industrial agriculture, etc
- Frequently displaying classic small-penis-adjacent overcompensation behaviours (loud utes , giant lifted tires, guns)
- Unresolved and poorly sublimated mommy issues that appear to transfer onto any small, independent, vaguely feminine-coded animal that doesn't obey commands
- low IQ usually left school at Year 8
Typical associated phrases:
- "The only good cat if a dead cat”
- "I love all animals, except cats”
- "My wife left me and took the kids or I can’t find a girlfriend but at least I can still take my inadequacies and hate out on a 4lb cat”
"That guy with the mullet and lifted F-150 keeps posting about how cats are ecological terrorists is classic case of Feline Derangement Syndrome (FDS)”
by mojo at March 6, 2026
Get the Feline Derangement Syndrome (FDS) mug.