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Farmer John salt lick

An act where a male dips his moist testicles into a bucket of salt. The male then climbs up onto a cattle fence with his testicles free for all the world to see. He then proceeds to call over the cattle which have quite the liking for salt. Whilst the bovine is licking the man's testicles like a melting ice cream cone, the male proceeds to thrust his penis repeatedly into the nostril of the cow until climax.
Old man Smitha was always sure to have at least one sick cow with a runny nose to prevent chaffage during his daily performance of the farmer John salt lick.
by Kenneth Fister July 14, 2010
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jimmy john

when someone fools or takes advantage of an other.
by kris p bacon August 13, 2011
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Related Words
johning Johnie johnism johni johniesha johniah Johnita Johnites Johniyah Johnia

john kerry

A truly presidential, inspirational, intelligent,prudent, wise,experienced, and upstanding individual---John Kerry 2008
"I know something about aircraft carriers for real."
John F. Kerry

"I will never conduct a war or start a war because we want to; the United States of America should only go to war because we have to. And if you live by that guidance, you'll never have veterans throwing away their medals or standing up in protest.
John F. Kerry "

"No one is going to question my commitment to the defence of our nation. I don't know what it is these Republicans, who didn't serve in any war, have against those of us who are Democrats who did.
John F. Kerry "

"President Clinton was often known as the first black president. I wouldn't be upset if I could earn the right to be the second.
John F. Kerry "

"America now stands as the world's foremost power. We should be proud: Not since the age of the Romans have one people achieved such preeminence. But we are not Romans; we do not seek an empire.
John F. Kerry "


"I believe America's best days are ahead of us because I believe that the future belongs to freedom, not to fear.
John F. Kerry "
by Elvis-The King February 11, 2007
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John Force

When performing anal sex, the person on the giving end removes his penis and runs it up the recievers back, from crack to neck as to replicate one of the said racecar drivers infamous burnouts with the fecal matter of the reciever. Most popular in one night stand situations, or to be used as a breakup initation tool.
"hey what did you do yesterday?"
"I picked up this skanky slut from the roller rink and gave her a John Force!"
by 96redvette March 23, 2009
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John Nguyen

This person is amazingly sexy in every way.

He always get the ladies. They normally want to take his pants off and have sex with him.
Chelsea: Hey sexy!!!

John Nguyen: Back at ya wanna have sex??

Chelsea: For Sure!!!
by LOL FCKING CATS August 22, 2011
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Master Chief Petty Officer John-117

The Master Chief Petty Officer John-117 is a character of the Halo franchise, his only known name is John. He is known by many as SPARTAN-117, and more as the Master Chief, due to his rank. He is the last remaining SPARTAN-II as of late 2552. He was selected at the age of five to be in the SPARTAN augmentation program, meant to create super-soldiers to quell the Insurrection. The Insurrection was a rebellion from the UNSC. It was mostly destroyed by the end of the Human-Covenant War.

John, along with other SPARTAN-IIs, was augmented with various things. Not all SPARTAN-IIs survived, however. The survivors gained enhanced speed, strength, stamina, and agility. They were excellent tacticians and leaders due to their teaching of nearly every historically significant battle, and then some. In the end, though, John was lost after the destruction of UNSC Forward Unto Dawn. He was a hero, and died saving humanity.

Meanwhile, he has been mocked across the internet for the Halo story being poor and him being a 'fail'. While the story is not the greatest, surely it is not the worst, or it would be so bad it's good. Of course, your mileage may vary...

Please do not confuse with Mister Chief.
"lol mastur ch33f suckas my asshole

"which 1ne?"

"all eight lolololololoolol fuck u"

"Hmmm, this "Master Chief Petty Officer John-117" seems quite similar to other video game heroes."

"Yes, indeed."

"hai r u mster chif?"

"no im not a chef lolololololollollololooll1111"
by Darth Anonyseudonym December 27, 2009
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John Wayne hemorrhoids

The sound of large amounts of change banging against one's leg whilst wearing loose trousers. So named because of the similarity with the sound of cowboy boot spurs.
"I went to the shop this morning to buy a packet of Apple Hubba Bubba. I only had a £20 note but they had no fivers or tenners! So I've now got a pocket of Cunt's Tender and a very bad case of the John Wayne hemorrhoids."
by Skinbro July 20, 2008
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